Cubot: Yarr! Orbot and Cubot, reportin' fer duty, Cap'n!
Orbot: Oh, goodness, my dear brother. It seems you've misplaced your original voice chip again.
Cubot: Shiver me timbers, yer right! It'll be mighty annoyin' to have to write all of me dialogue in pirate speak!
Orbot: I suppose it brings some variety to the table.
Uh, guys, the rules?
Cubot: Avast! The Cap'n's right! On with the rules! All ye landlubbers be allowed to post once per race! Yer post can be as wee as a few paragraphs, but no longer'n five! After all o'ye have posted yer piece, ye all vote via likes to decide who had the best little story! We'll repeat until ye all get tired of it and a champion be declared!
Orbot: I think that covers it pretty well, don't you, Wario?
I guess so. So, to go over them again, real quick:
-Each race will last until everyone participating has posted once.
-Vote for a poll with a like! Please, keep your likes to a maximum of 2.
-Each post must be at least 2 paragraphs, but no more than 5.
-You can use basic items (from any Sega game, such as Speed Shoes or Nightopian Helper), racing skill, and track gimmicks, but no All-Star moves (except in your winning paragraphs, if you really want to).
-You can change the terrain with transforming, if you'd like.
-Posts will be graded on grammar, spelling, originality, and overall not-suckiness.
-You can (and should) include other forum members and Sega characters in the race.
-You must write from the POV of yourself and not a Sega character.
-Please do not chat during races; talking about the game and stuff is fine as long as there isn't a race going.
Orbot: If there's anything we left out, kindly send Wario a PM detailing it, as we'd like to keep this topic free of OoC posts.
Cubot: Or ye'll walk the plank!
Orbot: Was that really necessary?
Er, uh, yes. Anyway, for this topic, I'll be going by MS (my alias on several other websites) as not to confuse me with the sex-machine that is Wario. If you want to join the racing sensation that's sweeping the nation, send me a PM with your vehicle name, description, a few stats (like it has high top-speed but low accel, that kind of thing) and your alias for the game and I'll add you to the list of racers, which will be found in the Racing Stats below.
Racers and Vehicles
MS, in the Stardust Speeder: This sleek, red bike invokes memories of Stardust Speedway. Has high accel and decent top speed, but crappy turning and low weight.
Winston, in the Gay Booster: A purple car covered in narcissistic pictures of the driver, this vehicle has all-around stats.
Doc Spudhead, in The Animatron: Looking like something out of a saturday morning cartoon, this long, brown vehicle has insane acceleration, but is decent in all other stats, too.
Jacko, in the Bamf Bike: Bright red, and covered in Knuckles decals, this bike is fast. REALLY fast. But bump it...
WaterWraith, in the High Roller: Less of a vehicle and more of a WMD, this thing is fast and gets going fast, but it handles like Shadow the Hedgehog drenched in molasses. It's 'dem wheels, in case you didn't know.
Super Soniko, in the Phonic Cleft: A cute little sports car with great accel and handling, but meh speed. It's also pretty light.
Jin, in the Ice Car: A floating icicle, this thing controls as if it were on ice, but it accelerates quickly.
FourCartridge, in the Lancia Delta: An all-around good car, meant for all-terrain. It suffers a bit on long stretches, though.
Ash, in the Burnt and Brilliant: A car that's been through hell and back, the fire damage wasn't too awfully extensive, because this thing has good top speed and turning. However, the acceleration and braking aren't too hot. Heheheh.
Blue Wisp, in the Vortex Blastoff: A blue Audi that's been modded with HELICOPTER ROTORS INSTEAD OF WHEELS HOLY FUCK-! Great accel, meh top speed, okay turning.\
Blue-Sama, in the Baked Potato: It's a potato! That's BLUE! Handles pretty well, with decent acceleration. Doesn't like boosting or drifting much.
Palmtree Panic Zone: This first track is easy, with a few opportunities to go airborne and even a small lake to cross, if you'd like.
Savannah Citadel: Set in Mazuri, this blisteringly-hot plain is great for drag racing, at least until you get to the winding jungle...
Sega L.A.: A beautiful, seaside city built from the ground up with Sega in mind! Like some kind of cross between Outrun City and City Escape, you can expect lots of frantic, high-speed action! Blast up those hills, and over your competition!
Radical Train: A race through a deep canyon, alongside a massive train equipped with tons of weapons! Try not to get blown up!
Sweet Mountain: The most distracting track of all time! Try to keep your eyes and ears off of the candy and Eggman's voice booming through the track and on the road, because this track isn't as sweet as it smells!
Night Palace: Because I have LITERALLY no idea what the Cathedral of Kagutsuchi is, here's Night Palace!
Egg Fleet: Set high above the Earth, in some wierd, pasty time-rift, Eggman's fleet roars forward. Vehicles bound from ship to ship, so be careful not to fall. It's a loooooong way down.
Send in suggestions for future tracks! It's all up to you!
Edited by Witty Ladykiller Wario, 23 August 2012 - 01:31 AM.