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Dr. Christmas Mike

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Dr. Christmas Mike last won the day on August 14

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About Dr. Christmas Mike

  • Rank
    Writer and Artist
  • Birthday 05/15/1993

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  • Interests
    Games (Favorite - Sonic the Hedgehog Series)
    Manga (Favorite - One Piece)
    Anime (Favorite - Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood)
    Movies - (Current Favorites include Coco and Gaurdians of the Galaxy Vol. 2)
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    Male

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    DrChaotix
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    @MikeDrChaotix

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  1. Oh my God! When I heard Mike Pollock in Dr. Stone, I tweeted about it and then Mike Pollock liked my tweet. AGH!

    1. Ferno

      Ferno

      I thought I heard him but wasn't 100% sure

      Guess I was right

    2. Shaddy Zaphod

      Shaddy Zaphod

      Really glad he's getting some more mainstream anime work. I have to imagine Sonic is not a small paycheck but it's good to see anyone from our cast branch out

    3. Ferno

      Ferno

      I wanna hear more former 4kids actors in Funimation/ Viz stuff in general. It was a real treat having Veronica Taylor in DBS for example.

    4. Polkadi~☆

      Polkadi~☆

      Mike Pollock was in Promare, now he's in Dr. Stone. Seems he's getting back into the anime dubbing business.

      I tell you, it's better than the weird animated movies he usually ends up getting trapped into. I mean, if the work pays...

  2. So apparently X-Box is selling a mini-fridge and has somehow gotten worse at naming their shit.

  3. Knuckles the Echidna - Issue #1: The Dark Legion, Book One - Army of Darkness That title is some seriously whacked out bullshit. Seriously, I spent longer than I should have trying to figure out how to properly title this thing because the beginning of this series has so many subtitles. I would have been okay titling it “Knuckles: The Dark Legion” if all the books in the Knuckles series were titled that on the cover but they aren’t. Just the first three issues. On top of that, there’s another subtitle for each story too. Apparently the reason for this is because this was originally supposed to just be a three issue thing but it got so popular that it became an entirely different comic series of it's own. How sad. Anyway, welcome everyone. I took a week off but I’m back to make up for it with three issues of the Knuckles series with this first one brought to you by Ken Penders and Kent Taylor. Knuckles and his relationship with his step-dad, Ken Penders, is one that needs no introduction but it is a very interesting story to look back on. Not this one, the one about Penders becoming dangerously infatuated with Knuckles and the echidnas. This isn’t a man who made his start as a Sonic fan (and I doubt he ever really became one) so his imprinting on Knuckles is something that can easily be viewed as more of an egotistical thing. This was back during the time when Knuckles had very little explored about him and Ken Penders got to pretty much go crazy with taking what little was known about him and turning it into something that pretty much belonged to him. His attachment to this, as a result, really is more about the mythos he created rather than any real respect for the character in my opinion. That’s enough psychoanalyzing though. Let’s get started on this. The events here actually took place sometime before Endgame officially but Knuckles’ role in that was so minor it might as well not matter. Just pretend we’re flashing back a bit. We begin with Penders waxing philosophical about … something in order to sound smart. Something about the importance of chronicles or something. Like Sonic Chronicles, yeah? When I read the line “chronicle their yesterdays” I knew I was in for some shit. I don’t know why this man likes using the words “yesterdays” and “tomorrows” so much. I don’t even care if they’re grammatically correct or not. It just doesn’t sound right. It just comes off as someone trying to fake self-importance, whether it be to themselves or to whatever story they’re writing. He doesn’t really need to try hard to evoke that feeling when you’re saying stuff like “It is often best to liken history to a prism, an object with numerous points of view-” in an introductory comic book about Knuckles the Echidna. We start with an alarm going off in some unknown room. BEEP! BEEP! Ken Penders just got put in charge of writing his own Knuckles series, this is not a drill! A red echidna in the Forbidden Zone of the Floating Island walks in on a very high tech computer room and turns the alarms off, mumbling something, apparently to his brother, about Dimitri. However, it’s not Dimitri whose the problem (since last we saw him, he was on his way to space) but the dreaded Dark Legion. The monitor is showing people in cloaks, robots with designs from the 60s, and flying saucers. It was at this point, 2 pages in, where I began wondering if deciding to read these was a mistake. The design of those cloaked guys are familiar though. I definitely do recognize them from Issues 199-200 where the “final” assault on Eggman before he went crazy happened. This was during the time where Dimitri was also just a floating robot head inside a ball. Can’t wait to see how THAT happens. The echidna in the computer room is Locke by the way. I seriously couldn’t tell because I can’t tell the difference between these echidnas. We cut to Angel Island where Knuckles is making the proclamation that his life is apparently really good right now. Archimedes is there too, just hanging out with his mouth open, pointing at nothing and looking frozen. Paradise is then interrupted when his feelers go off because he senses trouble. However, he’s unsure of how best to proceed. “Hmm. What’s the best way to lie to Knuckles about this situation? It’s of the utmost importance that he can’t know his father is alive after walking into a wall of fire.” Before we can find out what that sound is we cut to the past where we see the Echindaopolis of old. The two scientist echidna brothers (Dimitri and… the other one) are holding their presentation about how to use energy from the Chaos Emeralds to rejoin with the land below. I think his son is talking about how his dad told him they totally can’t refuse this... and then they totally refuse this. Dimitri walks out grumbling about evil shit. I think he’s supposed to be angry here but that grin makes him look more happy than not. The coiling of his dreadlocks is also very interesting, I’m noticing. So yeah, Dimitri and... *looks up the other dude's name* Edmund are here talking to the council about rejoining their island back onto the ground after it's been floating in the sky for generations now. There's nothing inherently wrong with a goal like this but it isn't really something you can force an entire country to do if they don't want to. This is kind of where the split in Dimitri's psyche comes in and his son witnesses his dad walking out all angry about it. We then cut back to the present with Knuckles now walking in the same exact position you see Dimitri walking in above. The first cut to the past also saw Knuckles making the same face Dimitri was making when the presentation started which told me immediately that this was going to be the comic’s gimmick. I guess it’s fine. It’s an attempt at being artsy which… I mean, whatever. Anyway, they see a ton of flying saucers and tanks. I guess when characters need their own stories, the best way is to go for an alien invasion. Knuckles asks if they’re here to do bad stuff and Archimedes says he likes Knuckles because of his ability to assess the situation. Now… I’m not saying that he’s not sharper than the average echidna in this comic but… I dunno, I think most anyone could look at these weirdos and probably guess they aren’t here to sell you some cookies. It was at this point where the comic shifts back to the past and I… had a sense of dread wash over me at this point. I scrolled down to confirm if my fear that they were going to cut from past to present every single goddamn page was true and thankfully they dial it back as the book goes on, thank Christ. We cut to the point in the past where the big mountain with the dumb evil face is shown collapsing. The son of Edmund finds his dad okay, but Menniker, the son of Dimitri, is unable to find HIS dad. He tries to run in to save him but he can’t because he’ll be crushed. He also doesn’t know that his dad just became a Demi-God so he’s probably feeling a bit shitty right now. He’d probably be really impressed if he found out his dad was a Demi-God though. I think most children would be all over that. These little tidbits about the echidna’s past are fairly hard to recall completely mostly because the fine details are made more important than they normally would be… and also because I covered this material so long ago. Thankfully, chronicling it has made it so that it hasn’t been entirely wiped from my memory just yet. Back to the present, one of the robots in the invading army of cloaked guys is sent to look for the thing it’s sensing with its robot sensors. Archimedes makes him and Knuckles poof away which confuses it. Then, despite Knuckles having already said a similar line before, he says “Why do I get the feeling these guys spell really bad news!” Repetitive dialogue spells really bad news for me as well. Archimedes responds by saying it’s because they make an imposing first impression… and then THINKS about how they did the same thing four hundred years ago. So, one, he knows who these guys are but is refusing to tell Knuckles for some reason. Two, he knows his father is alive but he’s also keeping that a secret. So is his dad. And three, these ants are a stupid plot device and I hate them. This is all very strange already but it’s starting to hit me just how strange it is that Knuckles is being kept so in the dark right now. Surely there has to be an important purpose towards keeping things so secret from him despite him being THE acting guardian of the Floating Island right now… right? We cut to the past so we can see and… it’s a very serious situation that is being given some rather hilarious dialogue. You see, remember when the backstory for the echidnas said that they were technologically advanced… 400 years ago? Well, some things led to things and after they sent their island floating to the sky they did the immeasurably foolish thing of forcing an entire nation of people to collectively give up on their way of life through a vote in a bid to return to their natural roots. Natural roots that they never had, mind you. I’m not sure why these supposedly smart echidnas thought it best to handle manners in such extremes and not expect there to be repercussions but here we are. There was a vote; technology or no-technology. The majority ruled that there was to be no technology and thus the citizens were expected to give up their fancy shit. This poor sap had his VCR and remote control taken away thanks to his wife giving them away! Yes, these echidnas apparently had Monday Night Football. In one panel you can even see Menniker, Dimitri’s son, handing over a SEGA Genesis. Wow. He’s happy to do so because, as it turns out… So, yeah. Not everyone’s on board with this. Go figure. It’s like the technology prohibition that’ll give rise to organized crime. Except, probably a billion times worse. Imagine if the country passed a law that said you had to give up your technology. Your smart-phones, your PS4s, your hi-definition TVs, your PCs and laptops… The country would be on literal fire the next day. The next page is a list of names and ages of people who proclaimed “I WANT MY KNUCKLES COMIC NOW!” It’s kind of funny and cute. Back to the present day though and we see that Drone Fourteen still hasn’t given up chasing Knuckles and Archimedes. I don’t know...WHY he decides to do this but Archimedes says “Fuck it” and poofs onto the robot’s shoulder, loudly proclaiming he exists and letting the robot finally confirm that there are indeed intruders. Then Knuckles shows up and punches the robot back so they can continue running away, only this time, having pointlessly let the enemy know that they’re there so they can be properly chased this time. Also, Archimedes is being weirdly complementary to Knuckles this issue. Usually, when he speaks to Knuckles he talks down to him or condescends to him but he’s praising him at every turn here. When Knuckles punched that robot he not only said it was a good haymaker but added that the line he said when he did it was SO him! The line Knuckles said was, “It’s crunch time!” Anyway, now that the boss knows there’s definitely people they can kill, he orders his drones to chase them. Back to the past. So, the son of Edmund has come to tell his father that their incredibly controversial thing is an incredibly controversial thing. Edmund knew it would be but his son informs him that it’s actually way worse because there’s echidnas lurking in the shadows, wearing robes and having little First Order Star Wars meetings about it… ALREADY! Also, Edmund’s son’s name is Steppenwolf, which is kind of awesome. Edmund makes it clear that just because they’re taking the technology away doesn’t mean they’re destroying it... which... I guess that comes later. When I say these meetings are like the First Order instead of the Empire, I mean to say that they look just about as impressive as the First Order. It’s some goofy stuff. I do wonder what the time-line between the council passing the order to give up the technology and this group forming was though. Couldn’t have been more than a couple months. These guys might not even have a catering team yet. Anyway, they spot Steppenwolf spying on them and chase him down. Back to Knuckles in the present, we see that he didn’t really have a plan and has retreated to the Chaotix to inform them of the situation. They used up the element of surprise with all of them together because Archimedes decided to pointlessly reveal their presence to them. To be fair, I doubt it would have mattered for long considering just how many of them there were but it still feels weird to make the conflict worse before thinking up a plan. Either way, Knuckles tells the Chaotix the situation and the instant he does, the flying saucers invade. At this point, Knuckles realizes that Archimedes is acting weird and begins wondering if he’s getting info withheld from him yet again. You are Knuckles. It probably isn’t for a good reason either. The Chaotix hold their own against the invaders, crashing some of their vessels and knocking some of them out but more guys in tanks are coming. Oh no. Whatever shall they do? We’ll find out after the next blast to the past! Steppenwolf has stolen a flying saucer and is using it to try and get away from the First Order. The escape doesn’t go well. The Grandmaster doesn’t want any survivors which is a sign that these people have truly gone cuckoo for cocoa puffs in an impressively short amount of time. This is also the first time the term “Grandmaster” has been used to describe the leader of this group which rang bells of some of the tidbits from future stories as well. It’s an interesting feeling finding out the origin to some of this stuff. Back to the present though, we see that Knuckles and Knuckles’ Chaotix have been surrounded. They are taken hostage and taken to the leader of the legion who reveals himself to be… Kragok...! Dun Dun Dun! … Who the fuck is Kragok? I honestly have no clue. He’s an echidna with a cybernetic arm and eye who has business with Knuckles’ family. Perhaps an ancestor? Perhaps a name change to one of the echidnas from 400 years ago that somehow managed to survive like Dimitri did? We shall see. Uh… despite my misgivings, this first issue honestly wasn’t that bad. If the comic had stuck with shifting between the past and present literally every single page, I might have been driven crazy but it thankfully knocked that off the more the issue went on. It also dropped the pointless artsy move of having the position of one echidna mirroring another when we cut back and forth through time. Seems more like the beginning of the book had an idea and then as it went on it realized that its idea was dumb and more trouble than it was worth and dropped it. Also, despite how odd the echidna origin story continues to be, a lot of the super weirdness was given unto me a while back and thus hasn’t affected me AS harshly this time. It IS still weird seeing an echidna whining to his wife about having to give up his fucking VCR and Monday Night Football though. It would be immeasurably dumb to destroy all the technological stuff they collected because technology is largely the reason they managed to make their island float away from the trajectory of the comet in the first place those generations ago. The fact that taking it all away was going to have negative consequences should have been a given. I don’t know what these supposed geniuses were thinking but I guess we’ll find out more about how their hubris caused their downfall. Knuckles the Echidna - Issue #2: The Dark Legion, Book Two - Sins of the Fathers Shockingly, these covers have been pretty good. I wouldn’t have expected it from the Knuckles series of books for a number of reasons but when you’ve got a good artist, you’ve got a good artist. I... can't really tell whose who on this cover but they're drawn well. The art within the book is pretty consistent and looks fairly well done too. I’m appreciative of it because there’s only so much badness I can handle at once. Art for these issues is being provided by Manny Galan and Andrew Pepoy this time. We begin with another one of these. This one is a lot less pretentious and a lot more straight-forward than the other one and it ends on an odd set-piece where, instead of finishing the “blood is thicker than water” line, it just cuts to Knuckles getting pissed on getting sprayed in the head with water. I’m hesitant to call it a joke. It’s mostly just strange. Anyway, we see that Knuckles was woken up by one of the guys in cloaks with a literal water gun. 4kids wouldn’t have even had to do anything here. Knuckles is understandably pissed and snappy with them. We see them leading him to Kragok, their leader while the two-page spread shows the numerous flying ships, robots, and tanks, offering a full-scale showcase of just how devastating their fire power is. As well as a little humanizing scene in the corner where they’re having a picnic. Knuckles is led into the tent and told to sit down so he and Kragok can have a little chat. Knuckles says it’s hard to do when he’s got shackles on and Kragok immediately tells them to release him, informing Knuckles that if he tries anything, his men will be all over his echidna ass. We then go back in time again. Where we see… the ant colony holding a meeting with their ant queen about what they can do to help the echidnas more… Just your sobering reminder that you’re reading a Sonic the Hedgehog comic, I guess. Christopheles is really worried about these echidnas because they’re basically self-destructing themselves. They need a guide and Christopheles decides to take part in doing so by poofing to where Edmund is and offering his advice. Again, I don't get why these ants can't just leave well enough alone but oh well. Edmund is busy grumbling about how the citizens are a superstitious, cowardly lot (yes, he says this line from Batman) because they don't want to listen to the guy who enacted an order to take their technology away. He is then surprised to see that an ant has poofed into his room for all of two seconds before being okay with it. The instant Christopheles mentions that Edmund needs to be the light that guides the way for his people or else his son might be in danger, Edmund bolts which leaves Christopheles to proclaim that he wasn’t finished yet and for him to go after him. So now Edmund is on a mission to save his son from… something. I know his son IS in danger but I don’t know how he knows where to go or that the danger Christopheles was talking about was happening at this exact, literal moment. We go back to the present now where, after being released from his shackles, Knuckles cuts the talking bullshit and immediately attacks Kragok. His guards smack him down and then Kragok smacks him in the face when Knuckles tries to make the claim that he isn’t tough because his guards are doing their work for him. Kragok asks where the Chaos Chamber is and Knuckles says he doesn’t know. Kragok doesn’t buy that answer and… for some reason leaves the tent. He tells his guards to beat Knuckles up but they get beat up instead and Knuckles takes one of their cloaks, revealing the hideous metallic monstrosities underneath. Also, his new catch-phrase is back. Exactly how dumb of a villain do you have to be to get so easily out-smarted by Knuckles? This guy basically just handed Knuckles a win. When he released Knuckles’ shackles, I assumed he had some other way to suppress Knuckles as a show of confidence in himself but it was literally just his mooks. That would have been unimpressive enough on its own but then the guy just leaves the tent. What an idiot. He let Knuckles go after having captured him and got zero information out of it. Seriously, why did he release him? Who cares if Knuckles is uncomfortable when you’re a villain. Fuck his comfort. We’re going back to the past yet again… Edmund has come upon the crash site of his son Steppenwolf. Again, no idea how he knew this was happening and sure as hell don’t know how he found out that THIS was the place he needed to go. Christopheles certainly didn’t tell him that. Then, things get heavy when this happens. Yeah, Edmund gets shot during his mission to save his son. The guards here make a joke about how he’s never coming back from Never-Never land which is a very odd time for a reference like that. Poor Steppenwolf comes from the smoke and finds his father, now a corpse and cradles him in his arms, saying that it should have been him instead. There’s no explanation for how Steppenwolf survived, which alone I’d have been okay with, but there’s literally no scratches on him. He doesn’t even look hurt. I don’t really get it but it doesn’t take away from the odd tragedy of his father dying for no reason when his son was actually okay. If only Christopheles, the ant angel of death, didn’t poof in to give him that warning. Speaking of which-! It’s… more than a little disturbing that Christopheles is so immediately accepting of the fact that he just got Edmund killed. He literally doesn’t seem to give a shit at all, instead immediately heaping responsibility for the strength to CONTINUE onto his son. He says he’s here to help and one look at Edmund’s corpse just makes me want to go- Back in the present, Knuckles uses his disguise to easily get back to the Chaotix and let his mates free. Boy what a huge unimpressive idiot Kragok is eh? As this happens, we cut back to Locke who is watching all this play out on several monitors from within his isolated chamber in the Floating Island. Archimedes poofs back in as Locke comments about how his son needs more help. I guess, before they can provide it, the alarm goes off again and they head out to see who the intruder is. Turns out it’s an old face. Athair from the Tails mini-series. You know, the Tails mini-series where this old echidna showed up to info dump about the Ancient Walkers and a bunch of history about the echidnas to Tails… in the TAILS mini-series. Still no explanation for why Locke needed to pretend he killed himself by walking into a fire in front of his son or why he’s monitoring his life through some TV screens within the island. I’d very much like to get one soon because it’s really bothering me now. Athair and Locke get into an argument about which of them were selfless and which of them was selfish. Then this happens-! It’s hilarious. The ancient walkers appear behind Athair to punctuate how the situation is more dangerous than they think… and then they immediately disappear without explaining shit. There’s being needlessly cryptic and then there’s just being douchey. The last time the Ancient Walkers pulled this shit, there was literally no reason they couldn’t have just been straight forward with Knuckles about what he needed to do and I’m willing to bet that’s the same situation here. It’s even funnier that Locke, of all people, is complaining about them not explaining shit. Archimedes wants to head back to Knuckles, fearing that Knuckles might think he’s abandoned him but Locke puts a stop to that, saying that they’ll be fine and his wisdom is best kept here for now. I don’t yet know why so I’ll just assume he’s doing it to be even more of a dick to his son. We cut back to the past yet again…! Here we see that instead of Edmund, the one being guided and trained by Christopheles is his son Steppenwolf. I’m not sure what the point of the torch passing was because it kind of just feels like we needlessly swapped echidnas here. Didn’t even know Edmund HAD a son before these stories after all. I guess Edmund was a bit too much of an asshole. Whatever though. Steppenwolf trains and learns the art of science and becoming buff and being one with nature and all that jazz. He eventually takes to becoming the new guardian of the Chaos Emerald and is eventually shown the Haven. What is the Haven you ask? Why it’s the mechanical area that Locke is in, monitoring his son while he sleeps all the time. This image almost had me thinking that Christopheles was going to lead Steppenwolf off a cliff and get him killed too. No, it's apparently just the place where Edmund took all the technology that he took from his own people. Fantastic guy, that one... Back to the present, Knuckles and his crew have been busting through the island, trying to escape but Kragok and his tanks have had enough of their shit and take to firing fireballs at them to burn the forest down around them. The whole time, Vector has been complaining like a whiny little bitch for some reason, even saying he demands they stop running, not because he wants to fight, but because he’s tired and he’s willing to let the enemy have his hide if it means he can stop exercising. He also speaks in annoying hip-hop lingo. It’s really not endearing. The issue ends on a bunch of animals coming from the burning forest and making a bee-line for the escaping heroes. So things are rather… Chaotic now. Shall we say? Yeah?! Again, nothing really technically wrong with this issue either. I’m mostly just waiting to see where this all comes to a head as I’m not entirely certain I’m grasping the point of this story just yet. I can totally feel that something important is going down and the flashbacks are actually interesting enough to sell that feeling but it’s not clicking just yet. Hopefully, the third issue will make it clear. That said, Kragok’s actions in this issue were monumentally stupid and the cryptic nonsense from both Locke and the Ancient Walkers are trying my patience. I have a little sympathy for Steppenwolf, surprisingly. Losing his father and taking up the mantle of guardian as per the instruction of a meddling ant who he doesn’t know has to feel like a one-way street as far as the direction you didn’t expect your life to take. Time for the conclusion to this… whatever this is. Knuckles the Echidna - Issue #3: The Dark Legion, Book Three - Blood is Thicker Again, another well done cover. Honestly, this hasn’t been as painful an experience as I expected going in. However, it’s still mostly mundane outside of anything dealing with the admittedly intriguing flashback. All that’s happened in the present time is that some Echidna Storm Troopers showed up, took over the island, and then after their boss idiotically let Knuckles free, chased them down and set the forest on fire. That’s it. The passage this time is basically saying that Knuckles is right to have blind faith in the path others have plotted out for him during the entirety of his life. Knuckles has been lied to and has had secrets kept from him his entire life and this passage is saying the right choice is for him to have faith in the circumstances that led him to this point where he’s surrounded by a huge army of people who want to kill him for reasons he doesn’t know with barely any friends to help due to being isolated from the rest of the world ever since he was born. The people who do know what’s going on won’t tell him anything while he’s stuck with dealing with the consequences of all of it. So yeah… have faith in THAT Knuckles. It’s the right thing to do. Okay so this issue begins with the group of… what I THOUGHT were mostly flickies rushing at them and Mighty needing to push down a tree to create a roadblock so that they don’t get trampled by them instead of protecting them FROM the fire they're running from but… I DID see that rat in a suit running at the front of the pack. That rat looks like a guy who deals in LSD for some reason… hmmm… Well, anyway, upon closer inspection, this is a group of mostly Mobians. As well as Heavy and Bomb. And Hamlin apparently? I’m… so confused. I asked this question before during the Death Egg Saga adaption, when Knuckles said that the floating island falling into the ocean was going to lead to the death of hundreds, about whether or not he was talking about flickies and non-anthro animals or regular Mobians. Apparently, Mobians are just LIVING on the Floating Island which is baffling as fuck. I don’t understand. Knuckles punched out Dulcy the Dragon just for flying close to it. How is it that so many people are living on here? We never ever see people wandering around like this. It’s so strange! Where is this coming from? Were they all just living here before Knuckles was born? That can’t be the case right? How does this make sense? Explain it to me, please. I’m short-circuiting from the confusion. This is somehow more confusing than what they do to put out the fire, which is to have Vector crank his headphones up to Max and have it blow the fire away. What a dangerous max setting. I sometimes crank my headphones up to max by accident. The amount of force it would take to put out a fire that big would probably blow my head off. We even see Mighty have to hold Charmy so that he doesn’t get blown away in a panel that has Charmy looking the absolute smallest I’ve ever seen him look before. The blast is so strong that the intruders on their flying saucers have no choice but to retreat even. What devastating power. Still doesn’t compare to Vector’s own pipes though. We travel back to the past to see that the beginnings of the Dark Legion are attacking the high council of these idiot echidnas. Just then, Steppenwolf returns to tell everyone that they can’t give up, proclaiming, I guess, that he’s here to help lead them? One of the echidnas stands up in anger and points out that it’s Steppenwolf’s family’s fault that they’re all in this mess. Steppenwolf points out that their family also saved them too and the other guy asks if this is a fact. Okay, so we have to stop and analyze this for a bit because I had actually forgotten some of the details here. It was Edmund and the judge guy who decided that in order to make up for the sins of ONE DUDE who went crazy (Dimitri) that the ENTIRE echidna clan needed to give up technology and blow up their old city. I don’t think I’ve emphasized this enough so it bares repeating but GOOD GOD, this is really fucking stupid. Who could have thought that forcing an entire population that had grown accustomed to technology to give it all up against their will would have severe, negative consequences like this. I can’t even really muster up any real opinions on these Dark Legion folk because their actions feel very cartoonishly evil for no real reason. They’re cloaked in shadow and shooting people and now they’re attacking Knuckles’ island with an army of tanks and robots but all I feel about it is… nothing. I don’t yet understand why these guys are villains yet. Who the fuck would be okay with people legislating for them that they could no longer keep their technology because the brother of the guy who is forcing them all to do this went crazy? The last two of these issues have been mostly aimless and mundane but this third one is starting off really whacked out and crazy. I tried to figure out which of these panels I should show you but I couldn’t so just look at this whole page. Fucking what? I’m reminded of a story I read in school about a kid who went on a journey and became enlightened thanks to Buddhism and was bowed to immediately upon being seen again by his former friend. Only this shift is way stranger because this dude went from wanting to shoot him in the chest and delivering his head on a platter to crying and saying he isn’t worthy… These echidnas are all insane. Kill them all. This is starting to remind me of the creepy Uchiha clan bullshit where their magic emo eyeballs made it so that they can’t handle bad things happening to them and they turn evil. Edmund took away their technology. Dimitri went crazy and tried to take over the world and was only stopped because some ants ate through Mount Fate and buried him under some rocks. Nothing his family did has saved any of them. They've literally only made things worse. But bow before Steppenwolf I guess? What is wrong with this species? Dark Legion, please destroy them all. Anyway, Steppenwolf’s long, egregious journey has fitted him with apparent words of wisdom and those words of wisdom amount to saying “Our country is divided. We need to build a bridge to each other” and then he fucks off and leaves. The judge says he’s a shining example of what they need and I’ve never wanted to punch a dude in the face as badly as I did him. Now that I can fully recall the fact that Edmund and the judge were the deciding factors in deciding to take everyone’s tech away and blow up their old city, I kind of wonder if Edmund had it coming. Anyway, Knuckles’ group put on the disguises of the Dark Legion members they’ve beaten and somehow learn to fly their flying saucers so that they can fly to a large tower sticking out of the grass. Knuckles wonders how no one could have seen that thing before and Locke, watching this on the monitor, doesn’t answer that for the reader and just points out that it’s been there for a long time, making the mystery of how no one could have discovered it worse. Archimedes points out that the Dark Legion is not a pleasant subject to which Locke responds-! You almost seem frustrated with the fact that Knuckles doesn’t know this Locke. Did you somehow expect Knuckles to feel like he wasn’t alone with you monitoring him from behind the scenes like this? Typically when a father isn’t present in their son’s life, they tend not to feel their presence at all no matter how many creepy cameras are watching him at night. Locke still decides not to go show himself to his son and instead sends Archimedes to him. Still no explanation for why Locke is keeping himself secret or why he had to walk into the fire that one day. It’s irritating. Knuckles and his group reach the meeting where Kragok and his men are ready to snatch the Chaos Emerald. Knuckles shows up and mocks him and Kragok says he’ll have the person who said that flogged. Then Knuckles reveals it was actually him and not one of his followers by pulling off his hood. Kragok responds by making a face and pointing at him like a Phoenix Wright character. We cut back to the past where Steppenwolf is going to confront the then leader of the Dark Legion. It’s here where I remembered the set-up scene of the two boys watching their fathers fail to convince the council to put the island back on the planet... Steppenwolf goes to talk to the guy and a sniper from the distance has a gun trained on Steppenwolf… but the gun heats up and he drops it. The leader of the Dark Legion notices and says that Steppenwolf isn’t to be trusted because of this? Even though he’s the one who had a guy about to shoot Steppenwolf from behind? Well, anyway, they fight. The leader here talks about how he wants revenge and Steppenwolf has no idea what he’s talking about. He then pulls off the mask and gasp, it’s Old Man Jenkins Menniker! Shock horror. It’s the only other named echidna who it could have been. He’s gone c-c-c-craaaaazy! He goes into why he did all this next and… Kay, so, you got that? He went up to his father’s “grave” and saw flashes of light coming from it and took that to mean that his father had sent him the message that he wanted him to continue what he had started… Okay. I… think that might be a bit of a weird thing to take away from some emerald light pulsing in the ground. Was it flashes of morse code or…? ... Also, how does Menniker know what his father started? This dude is leading a group that's okay with killing people to get their technology back but Dimitri's goal didn't have anything to do with that. The act of taking technology away was something that happened AFTER Dimitri was buried under Mount Fate. It happened as a direct result of Dimitri's actions. So, by "finish what he started"... he means what exactly? Returning the island to the planet? Taking over the world? Well, it doesn't seem to matter because Steppenwolf uses his powers to blast Menniker away in a flash of light without batting an eye. Not only does he take him and his group out quick, he doesn’t seem to care at all that a guy he hung around with as a child turned evil and he had to just… wipe him off the map. Then the little devil, Christopheles appears on his shoulder and tells him that he’s very pleased with him and to come further into the dark side. I gotta say, the history these echidna guardians have with these ants is really upsetting. I don’t understand why they feel the need to poof themselves into their lives and start bossing them around. Literally the first echidna Christopheles tried to do this to, he got killed fucking immediately. I also don’t know why this conflict is being set up as though the only one to lead the echidnas astray was Dimitri. Menniker may have been inspired to continue what his insane father started because he saw some flashing lights but the goal of this legion originates from something that Edmund and that judge initiated when they tried to forcefully take everyone’s technology away. Apparently this story just ends with the echidnas having no choice but to just accept the fact that the side that voted for their stuff being taken from them won and is now being portrayed as in the right just because one dude went insane and got buried under some rocks? Anyway, back to the present, the fateful showdown between Knuckles and Kragok is about to beg-! Oh. Nevermind. Yeah, Knuckles just beats this guy’s ass and the Chaotix kick the ass of all their followers. Locke is sitting at his computer desk, talking to himself about some nonsense as he uses his magic echidna powers to stop their guns from working and other stuff. Kragok manages to run away and Knuckles goes after him. Kragok makes it to one of the air chutes and laughs maniacally as he runs away like a pathetic loser. Might as well have had him make his getaway on a pink tricycle while laughing. Knuckles crawls out of the thing while it’s burning and Locke watches on… not doing anything to help. Not even using those monitors to discern where Kragok went so Knuckles can follow. He even says that Knuckles isn’t ready to learn the secrets of this place yet and I seriously can’t fathom why. It’s a command center for the island he’s lived on all his life. Is being exposed to it going to give him radiation that’ll make his brain explode or something? I don’t understand. Please explain you weirdo. The issue ends with Knuckles and the Chaotix making it out and saying, “Okay but NEXT TIME!” That’s it. That’s the story. So final thoughts… terrible. Honestly. The most substance really did come from the flashback as everything that happened in the present day story was ridiculously mundane and boring. Guy shows up with an army and his army gets clowned after the guy lets Knuckles go like an idiot. The flashback was a lot more intriguing but for the wrong reasons. This story is very oddly set-up. Edmund and the judge forcefully took away the technology of their people and blew up their original city because Dimitri, Edmund’s brother, went insane. Then Edmund remained frustrated with the people for not wanting to put the island back on the planet when they had no real reason to want to do that after it had been floating above ground for GENERATIONS at that point. Then an ant poofed into his life and started bossing him around and got him killed… and then jumped ship to Edmund’s son instead and bossed him around until the group of people who were mad that the technology was forcibly being taken away from them retaliated and then got unceremoniously dealt with too. Dimitri may have gone insane but Edmund is a pretty terrible person too. I understand Steppenwolf is just trying to keep everyone safe but I don’t really get what I’m supposed to feel about his journey here. Everything about the way this Guardian set-up works is NOT good. It’s NOT good that Knuckles is being forced to live in isolation on this island while his father stays out of his life for no good reason. This Haven is a technologically advanced area that Edmund had made for the guardians too which makes him a massive hypocrite as well. He took everyone’s technology away but horded it so that only the guardians could use it. I don’t see the point of taking it away period if you’re able to recognize it has benefits. You can’t FORCE people to want to go back to a life of mingling with nature. Especially since the Echidnas were NEVER portrayed as a species that was one with nature, even when the island was on the ground. The entire reason they were able to get their island to float is because of how technologically advanced they were. Technology saved them from being destroyed by a comet! By the way, I had to look this up but Christopheles has Christ in his name. He’s apparently supposed to be Jesus Christ the Ant… or something. Goddamnit Penders. And fuck these echidnas. I read that before I started chronicling the issues on here. That was during the Tails mini-series, I believe. The one where we learn about the Ancient Walkers and the echidnas... for some reason.
  4. There's also something great about Eggman going the extra douchey mile to dress up as Santa before he steals presents from babies. He can't just do it, he has to make them think Santa did it. What a dick.
  5. An image of the Chao ripping off Sonic's nose and that geyser of soda being a geyser of blood just entered my head. I also got an image of Eggman turning to chunky salsa when he hit the ground. I think about that and I go... yeah. That's what Christmas is all about. ^^ (I saw the image at the end btw. I'm making one of them jokes.)
  6. Yeah, I don't have a ton to say about this issue. I had an inkling at the back of my mind that because it was four issues, it was going to suffer from what I like to call "Sonic Universe Syndrome" where the first three issues are nicely paced and have well-enough set-up and then the fourth issue is a very fast, almost rushed finale. It happened so many times with Sonic Universe. The fights in these comics have always had sort of an issue where they're never given a ton of room to breathe. That's why my favorite ones are the ones where Sonic and Mega Man fight Bass and Metal Sonic in World's Collide and Issue 7 of the IDW series where Sonic faces off against Neo Metal Sonic. The fights last for the entire issue in both of those situations and neither need to worry about wrapping up plot-points for a conclusion because they both immediately lead into what happens next. However, with Sonic Universe, the third issue would usually end with a full-page spread of the final boss battle opponent, hinting at something awesome coming, only for it to be wrapped up at the very beginning of the fourth issue because the rest of the comic needs space to actually conclude the arc. It's why I kept myself a little reserved when it came to this. That said, this was a nice little character piece. I certainly hope this did well enough for some of the others to get their own.
  7. Seriously, this Tokyo 2020 Olympic game looks gorgeous. Its so pretty. Also, it feels great just walking around a hub with Tails... except he's trailing behind LUIGI who I'm actually controlling! Why can't I switch to Tails? I keep pressing the buttons and it won't let me! I don't wanna be Luigi! 

    1. Jack in Space

      Jack in Space

      Who doesn't want to be Luigi? He's awesome. And Tails is Always relegated to supporting and following character… since 1992. That's his destiny sadly.

  8. Tails just got really excited about being in a boxing match. "With that pass, I could try my hand in a boxing match. Put 'em up, put 'em up!" he says. Its almost too adorable. It should be illegal to be that adorable. He's so happy to get to beat the crap out of someone.
  9. Archie Sonic: Issue #47 - ENDGAME Part 1 of 4 Yeah, I bet what I’m about to read will be JUST as good as that. Surely. It’s finally arrived. We’re finally here. We’re in the Endgame now. The finale to the Sonic comics that wasn’t actually the finale but a prelude to the events brought upon by Ken Penders going absolutely, butt-fuck insane and losing his goddamn mind all over the page. Seeing as how the Archie comics aren’t a thing anymore, I for one can not wait to see how spectacularly awful things are about to get. There are plenty of story arc names that get brought up over the years, consistently and for different reasons. Darkest Storm, Champions, Countdown to Chaos, Iron Dominion, Eggman’s Dozen, House of Cards (BLEGH), Enerjak Reborn, etc. However, I feel the one that I’ve been the most curious about has to be this one. If only because it’s literally the only story arc that’s ever talked about with any real importance from before the triple digit issues. The fact that it was the only arc I was aware of before Issue 160 speaks volumes. I heard it was awful. Judging by the cover, another thing I heard is already being confirmed true too. So, apparently, Sally fucking dies… or was supposed to die according to Ken Penders. This cover seems to be Sally catching the disease that most Disney villains succumb to near the end of the film; Falling-From-Somewhere-Really-High-Up-Itis. The finer details about the three main things I know about this story allude me though. It’s time I dived in and soaked in the spectacularly bad juices of the infamous… ENDGAME! … Okay, so first of all, the passage that starts the book off reads “It is the year 3235 on the planet Mobius-” and I want to exclaim something in disbelief so badly right now but I can’t because I have no idea what a 2019 on Mobius would look like. Is that the time Mobi the Caveman is from? Holy shit dude. Anyway, this passage does a fairly good job of setting the mood for what’s about to happen, considering it was supposed to be the last story they ever did. It states that this war that began right after another war had concluded (this planet sucks almost as badly as ours does) and that it has entered its 11th year. Goodness me. They straight up say it’s the final battle. I can recall another instance down the line where this is uttered yet again and, just like then, it also wasn’t the final battle. For you see, finales can only be abrupt and inconclusive in the realm of Sonic comics. Plan an ending and it WILL continue. Sonic and Sally are spying on an Eggman tower together and right off the bat, I have to say that I really like the way the art is this time. Bouncy and cartoonish but still mature and has some grit all around it as far as the backgrounds are concerned. It’s a nice fit. As for the odd couple, they exchange the typical banter between one another. “I can’t wait to kick some Ro-Butt-nik” and “I can’t wait to bomb some dodongos” abound. He grapples Sally over to the building and we zoom out to see Lupe, Drago, and the Wolf Pack spying on the proceedings. Lupe is feeling great about this. Drago isn’t because he’s the obvious traitor because he’d feel better if the wolf pack were doing it instead of the hero of the story. Lupe tells him to fuck off. We then cut to the first logic blunder of the story. Antoine, Bunnie, Rotor, Tails, and everyone’s favorite super-star, Dr. Quack are here. Already I’m confused. Dr. Quack correctly points out that he shouldn’t be here because he’s a doctor, not a Star Trek reference. Antoine responds, rather coldly, that he’s here because he was ORDERED to be there by their incompetent leader in case anything goes wrong. Yeah, like if a bomb goes off and their best doctor gets blowed up. A basic tenet of doctors in war-zones is that, well, one they’re not just standing out in the open right next to the fucking soldiers but two, there is often limited access to medical resources to even provide treatment. So unless that disk on his head doubles as a magic wand, I don’t see what you realistically expect him to do. Antoine tells the Wolf Pack that they’re not to move in until they get the signal, in what seemed like a practical, rationally stern dialogue bubble. Lupe gave a natural response to it too. Apparently it wasn’t though because THIS is when Bunnie and Tails decide to tell Antoine to calm his tits. Back on the Pinnacle building with Sonic and Sally, Sally looks like she’s dizzy so Sonic rightly asks if she’s okay. Sally says she is, which is a clear and obvious lie, and then starts to recount how the campfire and everything afterward just led to more questions than answers. Like the world’s shittest game of Jeopardy. After Rosy came and informed her that her dad was done trying to fulfill his dream of being the green Chaos Emerald, Sally spoke to him in what has to be the strangest reunion conversation ever. The first thing this dude asks is about his their regal status. Then he immediately just accuses Sonic the Hedgehog of being the traitor, slamming his fist onto the desk to emphasize it, while also stating that HOW he recovered is on a need to know basis (and yet Sally is the highest ranking person around aside from him) and doesn’t utter a word of thanks to her for her troubles. Look at Sally’s shocked face when he says it’s Sonic. She looks like he just told her something crawled into her pants. Just kidding. She’s naked. Whatever it is, it’s already all up in there sweetie. So, this couldn’t be anymore shady if you blocked out the sun and strung up a planet wide tent over the Earth’s surface. I guess I can’t blame her for thinking he’d wake up and immediately be concerned with his status and shift towards blaming her childhood friend for treachery. Seems like something he would do. Sally, to her credit, doesn’t buy it. She’s more saddened by the fact that her daddy would say such a thing. While she ponders this, Sonic tells her to get the lead out. Sally is the one that says the “Do it, to it” line, which is basically the equivalent to her signing her death warrant. Inside the base, Robotnik and Snively are watching Sally and Sonic scale the wall… … Immediately, the problems with having this be a stealth mission ushered in by a team of resistance fighters INSTEAD of just Sonic and Tails blowing the place apart rears its ugly head again. Robonik being able to easily spot Sonic if he were doing something purposefully destructive makes sense. What’s being portrayed in this comic is supposed to be some sort of covert operation that they planned out? They swung to the building and then immediately started climbing it and got spotted instantly? When Robotnik spots them, he says this horrible line. “If I were a nice guy, I wouldn’t do what I’m about to do… but I’m NOT a nice guy.” It’s such a shit line but I’ll forgive it because he’s Robotnik and he’s not long for this world. Anyway, he presses a button and guns come out of the wall underneath Sally and are pointed right at her ass. Fucking whoops. This same thing happens again in a future issue. Sally’s just the easiest of targets. Seriously coach. Keep Sally on the bench. So Sally’s being shot at and while everyone except Rotor is freaking out, Rotor is excited because this means he gets to use his giant fucking gun that he loves so much! He’s so happy he gets to blow shit up the murican way. You’d hardly believe this is the same guy that, down the line, Ken is going to have say to Fiona Fox that guns aren’t the way Freedom Fighters do things… only for Ian to have the character later reflect on that as a moment of hypocrisy. It’s so meta. Rotor fires a blast at the building. It misses Sally and blows the guns up right by her. Antoine is still worried until, of course, he sees Sonic the Hedgehog. He even does that weird thing where characters unnaturally say Sonic’s full name as though they’re saying the title of the book. That is in part why the next scene is so hilarious. This is the funniest moment of the entire run of Archie comics right here. I never would have thought that the height of comedic set-up and follow-through would be the part where Sonic the Hedgehog MURDERS SALLY ACORN. I want to set the scene here. Imagine the Sonic and Knuckles title screen music playing as Antoine happily proclaims “LOOK! It’s SONIC THE HEDGEHOG!” and then Sonic, our glorious hero shows up… only for him, with a big heroic, Mickey Mouse smile on his face, to cut the rope holding up Sally Acorn and delight in watching her fall to her death. Then Sally makes the death sound when she splats the Earth and the game over music plays as our heroic murderer winks and gives a thumbs up to the camera before running away so that he can avoid serving time in prison. I’m not even joking. The thing that kills me is the nonchalant manner in which he’s doing it with a smile on his face. Anyway, Sally falls. The next page is just panels of her hitting terminal velocity as she falls and falls. She rips through a cloth banner of some kind but that’s of very little help. She smacks against the ground with a hard thud. No dialogue. Not even any sound effects. Just pure silence. It’s actually fairly effective. Bunnie tries to go in but is fired at by an unknown assailant. That also happens to be the moment Drago, Lupe, and the other Ewoks rush in to blow some robots up. Bunnie goes to Sally and calls her Princess Sob… oh no, wait. She’s crying… she says “Princess” and then sob is written there to simulate crying… I dunno. It’s funnier thinking that she called her Princess Sob. Meanwhile, Sonic is confronting Robotnik, telling him that he’s fat and also shit. Robotnik fires a bunch of lasers at him and then escapes into the floor with Snively, going on about how his reality is about to go bye-bye. Sonic grabs a mirror and uses it to reflect the laser blasts from the cannons back at them. It’s only just then does he realize Sally’s not here. Then he goes, “Oh THAT’S right, I just killed her. Cut her rope and watched her go splat against the pavement. Silly me.” Anyway, while Sonic basks in the afterglow of his delightfully easy murder, Robotnik, after having taken his slide down to the next room (something in which Snively comments makes no practical sense versus a simple elevator) the Lord of Lard then presses a button that blows up the command center Sonic is still inside of. It’s a good day for Robotnik. He’s so happy at the thought of taking two of them out. It’s great. “Tense Minutes Later” (actual words in the book) we see everyone gathered round a dead squirrel in the road. They all casually walk around it and go about their day. Oh wait, no. Dr. Quack is tending to it. My mistake. Dr. Quack shouts at Bunnie to step aside and let him do his job even though, in the panel, she’s nowhere near him and the only thing she said was, “Doctor, is she-?” Thank you doctor. Truly it was worth risking you being on the war zone so you could tell them to bring her back to Knothole where you would have been anyway. I’m sure contacting you via a phone or walkie-talkie so that you could prepare for her arrival instead of hastily doing it on your way back is a much bet-why the fuck is he AT the war zone??? The Swat Bots come out and start shooting the place up. Better hope they don’t blow the head off our best doctor. That would suck, wouldn’t it? Everyone in the wolf pack provides coverfire while the Freedom Fighters struggle to get Sally on the plane and back home. Antoine says he should have stayed back to fight. Rotor points out who would fly the plane if he did. Antoine says good point. I then think back on how Rotor once rode Southwest Airlines into Robotropolis to pick everyone up but I guess, now, the genius mechanic only knows how to operate guns and not bi-planes. That’s cool. Tails brings up that they're missing someone. No one responds. He then asks about Sonic’s whereabouts. No one responds AND they take off in the plane. Then Sonic arrives right below them saying “Hey! Just got back from killing Sally. Where you guys going?” He’s wondering why they would just leave him behind like that… unless, him murdering Sally was something that upset them. But nah. Why would that bother them? Murder is his favorite past time. They know that already. We cut back to Robotnik who is having the time of his life. Boy howdy. I gotta be honest, how excited he is to see this go down is rubbing off on me. His underground transit, that he very much acts as though the majority of it surviving the explosion was a stroke of luck, carries Snively and him to Robotropolis South. He asks for a drink, pulls up a seat, and then presses play on the greatest show of his or anyone’s lifetime. I am of course talking about the part where everyone in Knothole turns to Sonic as the one responsible for Sally’s death. We cut to everyone outside the room, waiting for the Doc’s diagnosis. Rotor says that they’ll just have to hope that no news is good news. Then the doc shows himself and like a snazzy contestant at a game show, Rotor asks “Well doc-?” Then this- Now, the doctor is supposed to be shaking his head here. You can tell by the movement lines at either side of his head. However, take those away and it looks more like he squinted his eyes shut at them and that was the signal they needed to know she was done for. Tails cutely and solemnly hugs Rosy. Antoine and Bunnie begin leaking from their eyes. Rotor looks like he just took a big ol’ walrus dump on the wood paneling. It’s awful. Sonic, like a guy late to the funeral of the person he just killed, runs into the room demanding to know why they left him alone with his fresh kill. That’s when Geoffrey shows up and says Sonic is under arrest for the crimes of high treason and murder. I love how HORRIFIED Tails looks in that panel. The fact that he’s saying something as old timey cartoony as “Say it ain’t so” adds icing to the cake. It’s just a perfect scene. It’s also cute that Tails thinks Sonic saying it ain’t so would mean anything when he clearly saw Sonic, delightfully and happily, cutting the rope that attached Sally to her precious life. Sonic demands that Tails spit out what’s happening. Geoffrey finally tells him that he murdered the princess. That’s the look of a man whose surprised that they also didn’t want her murdered. What the hell man? What’s the world coming too when you can’t murder a princess without the blessing of your buds? Sheesh. And despite this serious situation, these expressions are just screaming Nickelodeon cartoon. I especially like how, as Sonic is being arrested with that dumb look on his face, Tails has a look that’s just like “Oh, well, I guess this is happening now.” We cut to Drago who walks in on Hershey and fixes himself a drink, cackling maniacally about the obviously evil thing he must have just done cause he’s obviously the traitor. Hershey is very wide-eyed and open mouthed about seeing Drago and that’s all I can say about that. This is the first time I’ve read an issue with the allustrious Hershey in it. I only recall her being talked about at the trial of Geoffrey St. John way down the line. There was a lot of issues that came about as a result of this character. Unresolved plot lines and Ken Penders thinking she got shoved into a fridge when actuality, Ian was saving the surprise that she was alive for a later date. Ironically, Ken's lawsuit was the thing that kept Hershey from being revealed as alive. Good times. Anyway, the sun is setting and the king, very NOT distraught about the loss of his supposed daughter, decrees that the prisoner be let in. Sonic the Murderer is then brought before the supposedly grieving village. The king says he has no malice despite the death being personal. He pointlessly asks how Sonic pleads to the murder of Sally. Sonic, of course, says he didn’t do it. The king doesn’t bother having a fucking trial and says that for Sonic’s excellent service, he’s not getting the death penalty but is being sentenced to life imprisonment inside a place called the Devil’s Gulag. I swear. This “How do you plead” thing is increasingly made to look stupid. The king even says “I knew you’d say that” when Sonic says he’s innocent. Don’t ask him how he pleads if you already know what he’s going to say AND plan on ignoring him and doing whatever the fuck you want anyway you… WEIRD squirrel person! Anyway, Robotnik’s laughing at this because he thinks it’s funny. Sally is dead, Sonic’s taking the blame, and he’s going to be spending the rest of his life rotting in the Devil’s Gulag. The end. I gotta be honest, despite how infamous this story is for being bad, I enjoyed the hell out of this first issue. It’s got the perfect set-up and the perfect hook. I’m all about the part where Sally dies and Sonic has to be stuck in prison forever. I’d like to see a years later arc about that. Sonic’s just in prison for a crime he didn’t commit and Sally’s gone. Meanwhile, without him, Robotnik’s just gotten worse. Honestly, life imprisonment is a fate worse than death no matter where it is. Having it in a place called the Devil’s Gulag has got to be worse than ketchup on pancakes. I kind of want to stop here and just have that be my ending. After all, Sonic totally enjoyed killing her. He was so cute and happy when he did it too. Maybe one day his friends will learn to appreciate the joy of killing, like your old pal, Sonic the Murderer does.
  10. The question on the card was asking about what Silver's favorite thing about the present (or the past for him) was. I guessed nature and the answer was a blue sky, because his future doesn't have those. Someone or something really fucked everyone over and its kind of interesting not knowing what.
  11. "Silver is from the future, where the environment is so ravaged that the sky is always dark. When Silver sees a blue sky, he feels peace." says info card No. 75 in the game. If this was info card No. 76, I could have made a Fallout 76 joke. Cause he's clearly living in the Fallout... No seriously, I want to see this fucking future Silver is from. What the hell happened?!
  12. Oh wow. This is the first time he's ever looked kind of cuddly. I have to give props.
  13. So far, Cream has her own adventure in story mode, similar to what Princess Peach did at the end of Super Mario Odyssey. You go up to her amd she tells you the stuff she did at each place she went while exploring Japan. Its not connected to the main story but its there. Also, I'm liking the character models, graphics, and lighting in this game more than Forces somehow. Its very bright but in a way that emphasizes the colors and not like they've got a weird lamp pressed against their faces. Sonic's shade of blue being darker and his quills not being cut down to resemble Classic Sonic is a bonus. I've already spent more time on this game than I did Sochi. Having a story mode, regardless of its flimsiness, REALLY helps push you forward a lot. People really underestimate just how much it does. Without it, I can see myself not picking it up again tomorrow. There's a bit more intriguing bells and whistles here but like with TSR and Forces before it, the samey nature of it all coupled with a lack of content won't keep it on anyone's radar for long. Even having skipped Rio, I feel like I've done these before. If you're going to reuse events, might as well put focus on adding more Dream Events and characters. That said, this is the best one I've played so far. If only because of story mode and the option to ignore the motion controls.
  14. I mean, I suppose quality and reception wise, the period during the mid to late 2000s was the worst. They kept pumping out game after game after game with very little polish in a desperate attempt to stay relevant during a period where worrying about that made little sense. In a way, they ushered in this self-fulfilling prophecy where they ended up tanking their own reputation. After Sonic Rush and Shadow the Hedgehog (games only a month apart) came out in 2005, Sonic Riders, Sonic 06, Sonic Genesis, and Sonic Rivals all came out the same year with trailers for Rivals, a game that took place after 06, coming out during a time where trailers for 06 AND Secret Rings were coming out as well. Than Secret Rings hit in early 2007 with the sequel to Rush, the first Mario and Sonic Olympics, and the sequel to Rivals at the end of the year. Some good games came out of that period but looking it over it really is ri-damn-diculous just how many fucking games they were making. The fact that they split up the team working on 06 just to make a stand-alone title for the Wii just shows how strange the sweat-shop, assembly line mentality they had during that period was. If we're talking a more personal note, the period we're in right now is the worst for me. The old broken attempts to be epic and ambitious feel like something I can at least admire and respect. Nowadays it mostly just feels like they're okay with just settling on the bare minimum, bargain basement qualifications for being a video game. It's doubly frustrating considering I feel they ironed out a lot of the issues they used to have back then. If some of those old games were made with the polish some of the newer ones have we'd be in a very different position right now. They went too far in the other direction. Now nothing's ambitious, everything's the same, the world is either stale or the same locations over and over... I want them to strike that perfect balance so badly.
  15. These games have 20 playable characters and I only ever play as 10 of them... Sudden epiphany aside, I skipped Rio and they skipped the Winter Olympics after Rio so this'll be the first Olynpics game I've played since I spent money on Sochi, played it for about 2 hours, and then never went back to it again. I honestly am looking forward to it a little. Maybe a little less since Charmy's not in the story apparently but oh well.
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