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Greetings, reader. I would like to welcome you to Komodin's Stories. This is the thread where you can read (and provide feedback to) various stories written by yours truly, such as:

  • The Blue Blur of Termina - A Sonic the Hedgehog/The Legend of Zelda crossover retelling of the game, The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask.
  • Mischief Makers: A Cybot's Tale - A novelization of the game, Mischief Makers.
  • Impending Doom - A What-If story describing what happens if Sonic made a drastic mistake while storming Mad Gear.
  • Sonic and the Return of Robotnik - A novelization of Sonic the Hedgehog 4: Episode I, II and Metal.
  • Sonic's Promise - A oneshot novelization of a sidequest in Sonic Unleashed.

For starters, you're probably wondering, "'The Blue Blur of Termina'? What in the hell is that, bro?" Well, allow me to provide a simple summary. Basically, it's a Sonic the Hedgehog / The Legend of Zelda crossover fanfiction, by yours truly. Based on the events of the game The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask along with some story elements from Sonic Unleashed, the story chronicles Sonic the Hedgehog and Tatl Beryllia's journey through the four corners of Termina to seek the help necessary to stop the catastrophic descent of the rogue moon before it annihilates the world.

If you like to read the full story, as released so far, here's a link, courtesy of me. For those of you who are on the fence on this, since I'm a nice guy, here's part of the first chapter.

Man, what a weird day this was…

 

Two months has passed since the Dark Gaia incident has transpired. After their latest victory against the nefarious Dr. Robotnik, things have been unusually quiet for Sonic the Hedgehog and his friends. With no word on the whereabouts of the infamous doctor after his last sightings deep within the Earth's crust, they've went their separate ways, if only for a little while. Child prodigy Miles Prower focused on his studies and tended to his machines in this peacetime. Other than one date with Sonic in early August, Amy Rose kept to herself, focusing on her boxercising regiment.

 

Sonic, on the other hand, opted for something more… adventurous. In the spirit of the situation, he decided to take an exploration tour through every continent in the world. He occasionally stopped by his old haunts, South and Christmas Islands, for a few days, to get together with his old chums. For the most part, he kept to himself, limiting his contact with his friends to a minimum.

 

One late afternoon in late September, he journeyed deep within the jungles of Adabat, in search for something - anything - to do. His six large quills swept lightly against each other as he jogged, making quiet hollow sounds that gave a little echo. He carried a large, bright red bag on his back, filled with various souvenirs and knick-knacks from his travels. It swung loosely from side to side, brushing against the two smaller quills on his back. The ground felt hard and solid under his red sneakers, leaving a few specks of dirt on the gold buckle and white socks.

 

A thick, humid fog lingered all around the dark and barren walkway, obscuring what little light that could beam down from the dense jungle canopy above. Faint calls and whistles rang out all around him; some were barely audible. Small puddles of mud and groundwater dotted the pathway, giving it a squishy feel to it.

 

As he trekked about, he spotted a group of large stone totem poles erected near the dirt path. He stopped in front of one and observed it. Each part of the four-tier structure bore different faces carved into its stony surfaces. The topmost part bore an exaggeratedly jovial smile. As Sonic looked the totem pole down, he noticed the expressions on them shifted from exaggerated joy to anger, to sadness, and finally to simple placidity.

 

"Weird…" he hummed. "Like those things from Green Hill…"

 

Shrugging his shoulders, he walked past the totem and walked further down the path. Similar stone arrow-shaped structures were nearby, lining the path in a way. Each structure stood in a circle of burnt ground, spewing small jets of fire around in a circular fashion. He could hear the faint sounds of a roaring waterfall off in the distance. In the near-silence of his surroundings, the waterfall sounded even louder than it normally would. A minute later, he finally arrived at a small clearing at the end of the path; Sonic came to a halt to survey the scenery.

 

The air in the clearing felt vaguely moist. Only a few bushes and rocks dotted the ground, surrounded by the jungle. The sky overhead was dark and cloudy, with blue flashes of lightning cutting through. Large flocks of birds, each as vibrant as the sky itself, flew overhead while making loud calls in the vacant air. As he gazed upon the overcast sky, a sickening feeling welled up in him. Not since the whole issue with Metal Sonic has the sky appeared so… ominous. Before he could think further on the sign it was apparently presenting, a loud rumble suddenly rang out around him. Sonic snapped back into attention and looked around.

 

Whoa, what the heck was that? Droplets began to rain down upon the clearing. At first, he thought the rumble was just a thunderclap, but then he heard the sound again, this time coming from his stomach.

 

"Oh." Putting his hands to his stomach, he sighed and gave a little chuckle. He hadn't eaten a nibble all day; he was much too focused on his travels to grab a bite to eat.

 

Perhaps, he thought, I should take a break before I head back to the village.

 

Looking around, he spotted a large boulder resting right in front of a tree out of the rain. Walking over to the massive stone, he leaped up and hopped on top of it. Reaching his hand over his shoulders, he unstrapped the bag from his back and set it down beside him. He reached in and took out two objects: one wrapped in aluminum foil; the other a bowl of red, sparkly gelatin sealed shut with a plastic lid. He set the gelatin beside him and started to tear apart the foil. As he opened the foil-wrapped object, a spicy scent filled his nostrils. It was a scent he was most familiar with, yet still made his mouth water every time. The aroma enveloped him as he removed the foil cover and tossed it aside.

 

Resting in the palm of his hands were a couple of jumbo franks, each wrapped in a crisp bun and slathered with a thick layer of chili. Little puffs of steam rose from the warm franks, lightly touching his muzzle. As the spicy aroma emitted by the twin chili dogs lingered in his nose, his mouth started to water. All he could think about was the chili dogs, biting down upon the chili dogs, savoring their every bit of flavor he could taste.

 

"Ah…" he muttered, letting out a sigh. "A chili dog: truly, a hedgehog's best friend. Bon appétit, Sonic…"

 

 

 

 

Come on… where is she?

 

He laid in wait from behind a bush on the wet grassy ground of the jungle, arms wrapped around his legs. He rested his face on his legs and sighed. His four huge, translucent wings drifted along with the strong stormy breeze. Various thoughts raced through the young fairy's mind: Where was his sister? Why isn't she here with him? Why was he even here in the first place? He wanted nothing to do with this; he just wanted to go back home.

 

Before he could contemplate any more on his current predicament, he heard a loud, hollow sound coming from behind. He glanced back and saw something blue from behind the bush. Piqued, he turned around and pushed some of the leaves back, careful not to make his presence known. The leaves from the bush brushed against his bare chest, tickling him ever so slightly. As he looked closer at the blue figure, he gave a little gasp.

 

It's him…

 

He saw a blue-colored hedgehog, clad in nothing but gloves and red shoes, sitting on top of a large boulder. A ray of sunshine rained down upon the figure, giving him an almost divine appearance. Two relatively long objects were in his hands, each wrapped in something that vaguely looked like silver.

 

As he looked him up and down, he noticed his bag sitting on the rock beside him. He closed his eyes a bit, noticing a whole cavalcade of materials barely sticking out from within. Rings, medals, keys and many others he could barely make out. From just a cursory look, he could see that the blue figure sure liked to collect stuff.

 

Tael watched as the blue hedgehog slowly took off the silvery material from the objects, revealing what looks like a reddish-brown stick with a whitish-brown underside. He noticed a small cloud coming from the two silvery sticks; from what he saw on the hedgehog's face whatever the smoke was, he clearly must like it. Looking at the hedgehog’s gloved hand, Tael spotted a silver bracelet wrapped around the cuff, with a green jewel embedded on it. The gemstone shimmered in what little light that could pass through the heavily overcast sky. Before the fairy child could question his peculiar bracelet any more, a quiet ringing sound rang out from behind him.

 

"Tael, is the coast clear?"

 

The voice was a bit high-pitched, yet airy in tone. He looked back and saw a pair of glowing red eyes peer out from within the bush. The eyes, flanked by a braid of blonde hair, looked around before locking on to Tael.

 

"Tael," the voice muttered from the bush, squinted at the fairy boy. "You spot anyone yet, bro?"

 

Tael nodded, giving a little sigh to himself. "Yeah, Sis. You won't believe this, but I think I see that blue hedgehog guy from a couple months ago."

 

"The blue hedgehog?" the voice gasped. "Okay, I've gotta see him for myself!" With a blink, the eyes vanished into the bush, leaving in a quiet ring.

 

A few seconds of rustling later, a fairy girl, clad in a yellow dress, slowly crawled out from the bush. Standing straight, she ran her fingers through her hair, brushing away the dirt and leaves caught within it. Tael saw beads of water roll down her glowing skin, dripping down to the soft ground below. Brushing off her stockings, the fairy girl walked up to Tael, smiling brightly.

 

"Had a nice wash, Tatl?" he asked, making a little smile.

 

"A long needed one..." The girl, Tatl, nodded, ringing the bells on her braid. "Is that blue hedgehog still there?"

 

"Yeah." Tael nodded.

 

Walking past Tael, she crouched down on her knees in front of the bush. Brushing aside the leaves, she poked her head out and spotted the blue hedgehog. She stared at him and sighed.

 

"Oh my goodness," she murmured, her wings drooped along her back. "It's actually him..."

 

Poking her head back in, Tatl rested her hand on her cheek. She hummed lightly to herself, staring up towards the sky. "I wonder if he still remembers me..."

 

"Uh, Tatl?" Tael leaned over to his sister. She had a vacant, spacey smile on her face, as if she was off in her own world. Her eyes started to drift off in two different directions as a spot of drool rolled down from her mouth.

 

He waved his hand in front of her face. "Are you okay?" Tael asked, frowning. "Hello? Tatl? Are you there?"

 

Tatl abruptly snapped back to attention, looking around in confusion. "Huh? What happened?"

 

"You were zoning out again, Sis," Tael said, scratching the back of his head. "Are you alright?"

 

"Oh, I'm more than alright, Bro..." She smirked. "I've just thought up an excellent plan to get that hedgehog's stuff!"

 

"Um, are you sure we should do this? I mean, he's busy minding his own business..."

 

"Why not?" Tatl asked. "He doesn't look so strong with those noodle limbs of his. Okay, sure, he trashed those monsters and that giant metal skulltula a couple months ago, but I'm certain we could both take him if he tries to fight back. Besides, he should've known better than to wander around in a dark jungle alone, anyway."

 

Tael sighed. "Well, I guess you're right about that."

 

"Exactly, little bro. Anyway, here's the plan." Tatl reached into her pouch flanking her left hip and pulled out a large dagger. "You'll stay here and play that whole "fake injury" routine, like last time. I'll go further up the path and hide in the treetops. When the hedgehog's guard is down, I'll sneak up and take him out with this. Once he's knocked out, we'll swoop in, take the bag, and get out of there before he wakes up! Got it?"

 

"Uh, you're sure this will work?" He looked back over at the blue hedgehog's general direction and shuddered. "I mean, he looks pretty dangerous and stuff. He trashed that metal skulltula like it was nothing! Besides, what if he doesn't fall for that trick? What if he just ignores me and move on? What if he tries to rob and takes advantage of me? What if-"

 

"Oh, relax." Putting away her dagger, she rested her hand on his shoulder and flashed a smile. "You panic way too much, little bro. You seriously need to learn to relax, okay? Besides, it worked before, remember?"

 

"Okay, I guess… as long as we don't kill him, right?"

 

Tatl gasped. "Of course, we won't kill him! You honestly think I would stoop to outright killing someone?"

 

"What? O-of course n-"

 

"Good. Now, hush." She rested her hand over his mouth. "He's about done with that food... you remember the plan?"

 

Tael nodded. "Yeah, Tatl."

 

"Good." She stood up and adjusted her stockings. "Stay here, do what I told you and please don't screw this up!" With a light flap of her wings, she took off into the treetops.

 

"Alright, sis…" Tael breathed a sigh of exasperation. "I just wanna go home…"

 

 

 

 

Finishing his lunch, Sonic wrapped up the leftovers and placed it back in his bag. Strapping it back onto his back, careful not to puncture it with his quills, he sighed.

 

Alrighty, then, he thought, shaking his quills, time to head back to the village for the night. Maybe I should visit the United Federation again tomorrow...

 

Just as he turned around to head out of the clearing, he suddenly heard a sharp, cracking sound off in the distance behind him.

 

He snapped back into attention and looked around, trying to locate the source of the crack. His ears twitched and pointed toward the slight shuffling and scraping near the bushes. Teeth clenched, he spotted a faint reddish-purple light emanate from the bushes at the other side of the clearing. The light hovered slightly off the ground, fading in and out of view. Sonic could only look on as the light flickered on and off, not unlike that of a lightning bug.

 

Huh? What’s that?

 

He slowly approached the plant, careful not to make too much noise. His ears twitched around, eyes locked ahead. As he went closer and closer, he could hear faint whimpers sound out from within its leafy foliage. He brushed some of the leaves aside, just enough for him to poke his face through.

 

A little boy sat on the forest floor just a couple feet away, his knees obscuring his face from his view. The boy, clad in a purple shirt and auburn shorts, was covered head to toe in splotches of dirt and foliage. Unlike any child he saw, however, the boy had reddish-purple hair, long elf-like ears and, to Sonic’s surprise, two pairs of huge, insectile wings sticking out his back, swaying lightly in the breeze. Despite his disheveled appearance, a reddish light still managed to emanate from the kid's dark purple skin.

 

"Hey, kid!" Sonic shouted, poking his head in through the hole. "Are you alright?"

 

"Huh?" The child wiped his face and looked up at Sonic. His eyes, purple as the rest of his body, were a little bloodshot, as if the kid was crying for quite a while. "W-who are you, m-mister?"

 

With one quick spin attack, Sonic sliced his way through the hole, splitting the bush in half. "What the heck are you doing here all alone, kid?" he asked, tossing the bush pieces aside. "Don't you know how dangerous this jungle is? How did you wind up here in the first place?"

 

The child looked around, a weary look on his face, before shrugging his shoulders weakly. "I-I don't know, mister. One minute, I was playing in the beach, next minute... I'm here in this jungle, all alone..."

 

Sonic narrowed his eyes. There was just something about this kid's story that just didn't seem right at all. "Hold up," he said, folding his arms. "Don't you have any parents, kid? I don't see why they wouldn't be looking for you."

 

The child looked down to the ground and shook his head. "I don't have any parents, sir. They both died when I was only a baby."

 

Sonic’s heart sank as the words echoed in his mind. With a frown firmly locked on his face, he calmly asked, "Wait, so you're an orphan? You don't have anyone taking care of you?"

 

The kid shook his head. "I only have an older sister, sir."

 

Sonic raised his eyebrows. "Okay, how old is your sister, then?"

 

"She's fifteen, sir. I'm only eleven..."

 

Sonic freed his arms and put his hands to his chin. It appeared that the child's sister -- if he really had one -- was missing as well. Frowning, he asked, "Okay, where have you last seen her? The beach?"

 

The child raised his hand and pointed at Sonic. "I think it was in the clearing, sir; further up the path."

 

"Alright, then, kid, I'll help you find your sister. It's the least I can do." Sonic gave a thumbs-up. "The name's Sonic: Sonic the Hedgehog! What's yours, kid?"

 

"M-my name is Tael," the boy murmured as he rose up from the ground.

 

“‘Tael,’ huh...” Hand to his chin, Sonic chuckled to himself.

 

“Hmm…?”

 

“Ah, it’s nothing. Your name just sounds a little familiar, is all.”

 

“Oh, okay, miste--”

 

"Hey, now," Sonic said, holding his hands in front of him. "Enough with that fancy talk, kid. Just call me Sonic, alright?"

 

"Sorry, mist--" Tael paused, and then corrected, "I mean, Sonic, just Sonic. Got it." His frown curled into a little smile.

 

"No problem, Tael," Sonic cheered, flashing a toothy smile. The heaviness in his heart started to ease off as he saw Tael's smile. "Now then, let's go find your sister! We should go back to the village to see if anyone knows you, alright?"

 

"Yeah," Tael said, nodding, "right, Sonic."

 

Just then, a loud, tinny voice rang out from behind them.

 

"Two targets sighted: one of unknown origin."

 

"What the…"

 

Sonic looked back and saw a large, metallic figure in the clearing. It had the general shape of a blue metallic man, as big as the boulder he sat on. Its torso resembled a steel-blue spinning top with huge silver buttons dotting its body. Its legs were small and stubby compared to the rest of its body; its arms, on the other hand, had large forearms. On top of its spinning top-like body was a structure that barely counted as a head: its only feature were a pair of red "eyes" that emanated a soft pink light.

 

Sonic gritted his teeth. "Another one of these Egg Fighter 'bots? He still has these clunkers?" He felt a slight tug on his bag; he looked back and saw Tael, with a worried look on his face once more.

 

"What's the matter, Sonic?" Tael said, frowning. "What's that weird metal man?"

 

"Nothing, it's just one of those Egg Fighter things ol' Robuttnik has lying around here. You know who he is, right?"

 

Tael only shook his head. "Never heard of him, si--I mean, Sonic."

 

Sonic hummed. "Well, I'll give you the lowdown on ol' Eggbelly later. Now, listen." He knelt down in front of Tael, taking off his bag. "I want you to take this and hide while I go take care of that badnik, okay? Last thing I want is for you to get hurt in the crossfire."

 

"O-okay, Sonic." He nodded and quickly hid behind a nearby bush.

 

Smirking, he turned his attention back to the patrolling Egg Fighter. Sucking in a breath of air, he crouched down to the ground, leaning on one knee. One hand to the ground, he looked ahead, lock on the robot. He looked carefully at the robot's every movement, the way it trotted, the way it looked around for its target. Once he was sure of how to approach it, he crouched down into fetal position. Hands over his face, he closed his eyes and curled into a ball. In one quick motion downwards, he started to spin in place.

 

Ready...

 

As he spun faster and faster, he heard a loud buzzing sound from ahead of him.

 

"Target sighted: Sonic the Hedgehog. Objective: Immediate Extermination."

 

Now the robot knew he was there.

 

Set…

 

Sticking out his ears as far as he could, he tilted from side to side, adjusting himself in the direction the buzz was coming from. A cloud of dust started to gather all around as he spun. A few seconds in, he could hear the buzz grow louder, masking the near-silent footsteps the source was making. His ears twitched; now, he was ready.

 

Go!

 

He launched forward as quick as a blur. He opened his eyes for a brief moment; first, he saw the Egg Fighter jump in panic. Next, all he saw were a few bundles of colored wires with a slit-shaped hole in front. An even louder, though brief, buzz sounded off as he went through the wires and gears. Next thing he knew, he was back on the forest ground, down on one knee and no worse for wear. Just as he started to stand up, a loud explosion sounded off from behind. The forest turned red and white as a fireball grew in size, wiping out everything in its path. Then, just as abrupt as it appeared, the fireball dissipated.

 

As he brushed off the dirt and soot on his body, a long metal rod crashed down next to his feet. Looking down, he reached and picked up the rod. A little hot to the touch, Sonic looked closely at it before smirking; it was the burnt remains of the Egg Fighter.

 

Brushing his gloves off, he scoffed, "Hm, looks like another clunker’s ready for the scrap pile. Oh well." With a sigh, he tossed the rod over his shoulder.

 

"Th-that was incredible!"

 

Sonic looked back and saw Tael, mouth agape. "W-what was that thing you just did to the metal man? H-h-how did you move so fast?"

 

Sonic beamed, chuckling. "Oh, that? Eh, it was just the Supersonic Spin Attack, nothing special."

 

Tael dropped his shoulders. "B-but, what do you mean, 'nothing special'? You practically warped, Sonic! You were like a blur!"

 

Sonic shrugged his shoulders. "Guess I'm just that fast."

 

As he reached down to grab his bag, something peculiar appeared off the corner of his eye. Looking back, he saw a bright red light emanated from Tael's face. Sonic raised his eyebrow at seeing the odd spectacle. He's seen people blush before -- for one reason or another -- but he has never seen anyone do it so brightly.

 

"Hey, Tael, are you alright?" he called out.

 

Tael looked up, redness abruptly subsided. "Y-yes, Sonic. Why did you ask?"

 

Sonic raised an eyebrow. "Why were your cheeks red, then?"

 

"I-I," Tael stammered, "think I'm just coming under the weather! Yeah, that's it! Just under the weather! It's nothing, really!"

 

"Uh, huh…?" He shook his head, saying, "Well, anyway, let's go find your sister."

 

"Okay!" the winged boy said, nodding.

 

Just as Sonic made his way out of the clearing, a loud jingle abruptly sounded out. Sonic jumped back and balled his fists.

 

"Wh-What was that?" Tael yelled.

 

Just as Sonic turned his head around to discern what was going on, he suddenly felt a sharp pain run through his shoulder from behind.

 

"Aah-!" He fell down on his knees with a thud. He put his hand on his shoulder and felt it -- blood soaked onto his glove, giving it a pinkish color. His arm twitched from the sharp pangs of pain surging through it.

 

"Tael?” he screamed. “Tael – augh – where are you?!"

 

Before he could reach his unharmed arm out to defend himself from the unseen threat, he heard a hollow, breaking sound from behind, following by an explosion of pain from the back of his head. He screamed as the force of the impact sent him into the grassy ground of the clearing.

 

He looked up as much as he could and saw a blonde winged girl standing over him, glowing a strange whitish-yellow light from her skin. She bore a toothy, sinister smirk on her face. Her eyes, a deep red, seemed lit in flames in the glow of her aura. His vision started to dim as he tried to get a good look at the girl. Looking up, he saw a gray, tube-shaped object in her grasp. He squinted his eyes and gasped -- it was the Egg Fighter piece.

 

What... the…?

 

As his consciousness faded into black, the last thing he heard was a loud cackle from behind.

 



Alrighty, so, if you have any questions, advice or concerns about any of my stories that you wish to bring up, feel free to post them. With me, constructive criticism is very much appreciated, so don't be afraid to fire away. Just refrain from insulting me, okay?.

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Alrighty, here's a basic draft I made for Chapter 7. As I stated before, any constructive criticism is very much appreciated, so fire away!

Back in the Northern Park, they stood in the center of the huge playground.

Sonic put his hand to his chin and stared into the balloon. "Hmm, I wonder…"

"What are you doing?" said Tatl, looking back to Sonic.

"I want to see if I can pop that balloon..."

She gawked at Sonic for a few seconds. "Come on now! We have to find that observatory and you're worrying about some stupid balloon?"

"Heh, watch this!" Sucking in a huge breath of air, Sonic started to blow a huge, green glowing bubble and spat it at the balloon. The bubble popped on the balloon, exploding in a flash of light. The heat from the light popped the balloon, surprising a nearby kid.

"Ick!" Tatl looked away and winced in disgust at the display. "That was SO gross…!"

Sonic chuckled and looked at Tatl, flashing a toothy smile. "It worked, didn't it?"

"Whoa! Not bad for a Deku Scrub," Sonic and Tatl turned around and saw a little boy. He had a red bandanna, wore a white-and-black shirt and blue shorts. He had brown shoes as well. "I'm Jim of the Bombers Gang. We Bombers have a hideout that leads to the observatory outside town."

"Oh really?" said Sonic, taking a closer look at Jim.

"Yep. You'll need a code to get in, though. Maybe I'll tell you what it is. But don't think you're getting it that easily! I can't just tell you what the code is, after all. You'll have to pass my test first. "

"A test, you say?" Sonic stroked his chin and nodded. "What's the test?"

Jim turned around and whistled. "All right, line up guys!" Four other boys, wearing identical clothes but was wearing blue bandannas, lined up in a row. Jim turned around and lined up with the other boys. "If you can find all five of us by evening, I'll tell you the code. Are you ready?" Sonic nodded. "Alright, count to 20 while we hide! Ready, GO!"

Sonic walked over to the nearby tree. He closed his eyes and counted to 20 while the other boys hid in their locations. "Ready or not, here I come!" Sonic looked near the slide, where he found one of the boys were hiding.

"Yikes!" said the boy, jumping back and collided into the wall behind him. "You found me. Oh well. Good luck with finding the others."

"Uh, okay." Next, Sonic looked behind the tree near the entrance to the South Gate. Another one of the boys was hiding there. "Aww, man," the boy replied. "You found me."

Sonic pulled out a pen and a piece of paper. "Okay, 2 down, 3 to go."

As he wrote his little score down, Tatl walked up to him and shook her head. "Oh, why do we have to play these stupid brats' little games?"

"Because these 'stupid brats' are the only way we're going to get into the observatory." Sonic put the pen and paper back in his pocket. "Just bear with it, okay?"

Tatl let out a heavy sigh. "Fine." She reached into her pocket and took out a yo-yo. "Hurry up and find the rest of them already! I'll be in West Clock Town! Tell me when you're done!" She promptly flew off into the entrance back to South Clock Town.

Sonic went to East Clock Town and looked around. He found one of the boys on top of a roof, about to jump off with a huge chicken. Sonic leaped over to the boy and tagged him just as he jumped off.

"Drat, you found me!" said the boy, drifting back down to the ground.

"Okay, where's the next one?" Sonic found the fourth boy on top of a wooden roof-like structure that was connected to an inn. Sonic walked up to the structure and shouted "Hey! Get down from there!"

The boy stuck his tongue out at Sonic in response. "Make me!"

Sonic rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Fine, have it your way." Sonic walked over to a nearby Deku Flower. He jumped in it and launched off towards the structure.

"Uh-oh!" The boy tried to run for the door, but Sonic landed on him.

"What have we learn today?" The boy only grumbled and drummed his fingers on the floor in response. "Good enough." Sonic jumped back down to the entrance back to South Clock Town. "Okay, now where's the last one?"

Sonic looked around South Clock Town but couldn't find the last boy, Jim. He went to West Clock Town and found Jim almost literally out in the open. Jim tried to run away, but Sonic dashed over and caught him.

"You found the others already?" said Jim, mouth agape with shock. Sonic nodded and pointed behind himself. The other boys walked up from behind him, looking pretty disappointed.

Tatl flew up to Sonic, yo-yo in hand. "Are you done with this pointless game yet?"

Sonic nodded his head in response. "Yep."

"Finally!" She put the yo-yo back in her pocket. "What took you so long?"

"Wow, you're pretty good for a Deku Scrub!" Jim walked up to them and nodded. "If only you were human... then I could give you an official Bombers' Notebook and make you a member. What do you guys think?"

The Other Boys all yelled out, "No way! No Scrubs!"

"I guess not…" said Jim, grimacing at the gang. "Once, we let some kid who wasn't human join our gang, and, boy, did we ever regret it! Sorry for the gang's reactions!"

"Okay, blatant specism aside..." Sonic rolled his eyes and shook his head. "Can you at least tell me the code? I need to go to the observatory and talk to whoever lives there."

"...OK," Jim said. "I'll teach you the code, just like I promised. I can tell you only once, though, so pay close attention! Are you ready?"

Sonic pulled out a pen and a piece of paper. "Yeah, tell me."

All 5 boys turned around, showing their numbers on the backs of their shirts. "The code is 35124! The entrance to our hideout is in East Clock Town!"

"Alright, got it!" Sonic put the pen and paper away. He turned to the Bombers and gave them a thumbs-up. "Thanks!"

"Don't mention it." Just as Sonic and Tatl started to walk away, Jim called out, "Hey, Tatl!"

Tatl turned back to him and crossed her arms. "What do you want?"

"If you ever see Skull Kid, tell him he's out the gang! He's been acting like a real jerk lately!"

"Yeah, whatever." Tatl rolled her eyes and looked away. "C'mon, let's go."

Sonic and Tatl walked back to East Clock Town and found a boy with a yellow bandanna guarding an entrance. Sonic walked up to him and said "Um, excuse me. Is this the entrance to the Bombers' Hideout?"

"Yeah," replied The Guard Boy, looking up to Sonic and Tatl. "If you want to pass through here, you have to say the secret code."

"It's 35124, correct?"

"Um, that's right," said The Guard Boy, stroking his chin. "If you know the code, then you're a member, right?"

"Well, you could say that…" said Tatl, looking away from the kid.

"Okay, here we go," The Guard Boy started to walk out of the entrance, allowing Sonic and Tatl access to the passageway. "There's a lot of cool stuff in that telescope guy's place! Oh yeah, and, um... The Bombers Secret Society of Justice forever!"

Sonic and Tatl went down into the Bombers' Hideout.

It was dark, illuminated only by torches planted here and there. The room itself felt dank and moist. The air reeked of a horrid smell, akin to a decaying corpse. The crackling of the torches and the running water were the only sounds heard in the dark room.

"This is their hideout?" Sonic looked around and shook his head. "I know some little boys like messy stuff, but this is ridiculous! Is this the town's sewer system or something?"

"Yeah, it is." Tatl flew over to the short river of water where the path splits. She looked to her left and saw the path lead to a metal grate. "Well, since that way leads to a dead-end, let's go this way." She pointed straight ahead of her. Pillars stuck out from the sewer water. A single torch rested on the largest one.

They went down the path. Sonic hopped over the water along the way, from pillar to pillar. Tatl flew right behind him. When they reached the end of the dank hallway, a black shadow, obscured in the shade, lowered down from the ceiling and struck Sonic in the face. It pushed Sonic down to the cold, hard ground.

Sonic looked up and gasped. A huge black spider hovered before him, hanging along a thick white thread. The arachnid carried a white, skull-like carapace on its back. It leered down at Sonic with its eight, beady little eyes. Green drop of a liquid dripped out of its fangs onto the ground below.

"What the hell is that?"

"It's called a Skulltula." Tatl pointed at the spider. As she did, the Skulltula rose itself bak towards the ceiling. "It has a rock-hard exoskeleton, so you can't just attack it from the front."

"Okay, Ms. Exposition Faerie, where CAN I strike it?"

"You just have to hit it on its underbelly."

"Alright." Sonic got up and reached into his pocket, pulling out a Deku Nut. "Hey Skulltula, here's a surprise!"

He threw the Deku Nut at the Skulltula, releasing a bright light and stunning the arachnid. He slid under the spider and shot a bubble at its underside, causing it to fall over unconscious. He grabbed the unconscious arachnid by the side and pushed it into the water nearby on its back.

It struggled and thrashed its legs about in the water, unable to correct itself in the deep water After a few seconds, it finally stopped thrashing about and drowned.

Sonic brushed himself off and said, "Okay, let's go to that observatory."

They walked into the room. There was nothing in it except a large balloon and a ladder.

Sonic popped the balloon and climbed up the ladder.

He walked further down until he made it to a wooden room with a large, sparkling staircase. It was filled with some astronomy-related items.

"Hey, why is there a chicken in this cage?" Sonic walked up to a chicken in a cage.

"It's called a Cucco." Tatl reached into the cage and petted the chicken. It let out a soft cooing sound and gently pecked at her hand. "They're your basic garden-variety poultry. Just don't try to attack it, though."

"What happens if you do?"

"It'll call other Cuccos to come and kill you."

"Oh." Sonic turned around and saw a staircase at the other side of the room. It was colored like a rainbow and shimmered in the sunlight. "From the looks of things, this staircase should lead us to the observatory. Let's go."

As they walked up the stairs, the room changed from a discolored, disheveled storage room to a beautiful, ornate room with rainbow-swirling design. The stair steps itself changed colors according to the rainbow, from red all the way to violet. At the top, Sonic and Tatl saw a man dressed in a blue robe looking through a very large telescope.

"Wow, that's one of the biggest telescopes I've ever seen!" Sonic gazed at the massive telescope. ""

"Impressed, no?"

The man moved slowly over to Sonic and Tatl, his hunched form supported by a polished wooden cane gripped in a gnarled, swollen-jointed hand that was covered by translucent, liver-spotted skin.

"Greetings, I am Shikashi, professor of astronomy."

He leaned over and took a closer look at Sonic. "Well, well… A strange-looking children have joined me today… Are you a new friend of the Bombers gang?

"Well, you could say that," said Sonic, looking over to the telescope.

"…Hmmm. Your manners seem much better than those of your mischievous friend from the other day. Hrnf, hrnf, hrnf!"

"Can you tell me some more of this "friend" of ours?" said Tatl, looking at Shikashi.

"Yes." Shikashi gripped onto his wooden cane and grunted. "That ill-mannered troublemaker from the other day said he'd break my instruments. He said he'd steal my Moon's Tear… there was no stopping him. Even now, he's causing all sorts of mayhem. Just watch him! He's probably causing trouble around the clock tower right now! Will you gaze into my telescope?

"Sure, I love to!" Sonic walked over to the telescope. Its dark-blue color shimmered in the morning sunlight. He tried to reach for the eyepiece but, due to his height, he couldn't reach it. "Uh, a little help here, please."

"Oh, sorry," Shikashi re-adjusted the telescope. "Here you go."

"Thanks," Sonic looked into the telescope. He looked around with it until he saw a strange shadowy figure on top of the clock tower."Hmm, I see something." He focused in until he saw that a familiar figure with a strange mask staring right at him. "It's the Skull Kid!"

"What?" Tatl flew over to him in a hurry. "Hey, let me see him!"

"Wait, he's looking up at something." He pointed the telescope up into the sky. He saw the Moon, leering extremely close in the morning sky. It stared down towards the unsuspecting town with an actual "face". It's "face" was fixed into a manic grin with creepy, piercing yellow "eyes".

"Oh my Gaia!" Sonic backed away from the telescope and clutched his chest. "How did I manage to miss that until now?"

Tatl flew up to the telescope and peered into it."I don't see what you're rambling abo-Huh?"

As she focused the telescope towards the moon, something fell off the moon's "eye". It was falling towards the planet, a fiery ring enveloping around it as it careened towards the planet. When the object hit the ground with a loud bang, she looked over and saw it landed near the observatory. A huge crater surrounded it from the impact.

"That was weird..." She got out of the telescope and stroked her chin. "What was that object?"

"Wait, where's the Skull Kid?" Sonic went back over to the telescope and refocused it back at the clock tower. When he zoomed in, he saw the masked imp. Pants down, he shook his rear at Sonic's general direction. He gave one last smack before jumping off the tower. "Son of a bitch...!"

Shikashi walked over to the plant and faerie. "Well, did you find that troublemaker?"

"Yes!" Sonic clenched his fists and growled. His face flushed a bright red color. Steam practically billowed out of his ears. "The imp mooned me!"

"I see. And that loud noise…What was that?"

Sonic got up from the telescope and walked over to the staircase. "It was a blue, glowing tear-shaped object that fell from that huge moon. Seriously, did you see the size of the moon?"

"Aah, the moon." Shikashi gazed up to the sky and sighed. "I have been enamored with the moon since I was a child. Now, I spend my days gazing at it from here. The moon has long been considered a mystical body, which people have worshiped and feared. That alone shows how the moon has a cosmic influence that affects our daily lives. But lately, there is something quite strange with the moon. Strange, indeed... It seems as though the moon is being pulled down by something and is slowly drawing closer..."

"Hmm…" Tatl stroked her chin and sighed.

"Anyway, go through that door and take a look outside. But I wonder how that troublemaker got on top of the clock tower?"

Sonic shrugged his shoulders in response as he made his way to the door. "Beats me."

"The only way up there is through the clock door, and that opens only on the eve of the carnival."

"A carnival? Hmm…" Sonic and Tatl walked out the door and saw the blue stone right in front of him. "Hmm, looks just like the stone Prof. Shikashi has." He crouched down and took a closer look at the blue stone. Its crystalline structure glow an almost-supernatural aura. "Wow, looks almost like a Chaos Emerald..."

"A What?" Tatl walked up to him and crouched down."What are you going on about now?"

"A Chaos Emerald. It's a jewel that contains awesome power."

"Huh?" Tatl just stared at him, eyebrow raised. "...You're kidding, right?"

"I'll explain everything on the way back to town. But, let's show Shikashi this stone first." Sonic and Tatl went back to Shikashi. "Here's the stone, sir."

Shikashi grabbed the stone and pulled out an eyepiece. He examined the stone, saying "Ah, it is a Moon's Tear."

"A what?" said Sonic, lowering his eyebrows.

"That is one of the lunar rocks that have been blazing from the surface of the moon lately. They fall from what looks to be the moon's "eye", so I call them Moon's Tears." Shikashi put the eye piece away and handed the Moon's Tear back to Sonic. "Well, since I already have one, you can keep it."

"Oh, thank you." Sonic grabbed the stone and put it in his pocket. "Goodbye, sir!" Sonic and Tatl walked down the colorful stairway.

"Have a nice trip!" Shikashi went back over to the telescope."Hmm, what nice kids... Hrnf, hrnf!"

As they made their way back to town through the sewers, Sonic took out a pair of rings from his pocket and started to juggle them. "Hey, Tatl. Do you really think that... moon's gonna fall?"

"Maybe... That moon does appear to be too close for comfort. But enough that for now..." Tatl flew up in front of him and stopped him in his tracks. "OK, about those "Chaos Emeralds" whatsits you were blabbering about, what are they? Or are you making them up?"

"Oh, right," Sonic grabbed the rings in mid-flight and put it away. "Y'see, there are 7 jewels of different vibrant colors called the Chaos Emeralds. Alone, they're already powerful since they each have limitless power. However, when they come together, a miracle is said to occur. In the right hands, peace and prosperity will ensue. But in the wrong hands, death and destruction may wreak havoc on the world. So… what do you think?"

"…Yeah, you're making it up." Tatl rolled her eyes and sighed. "Typical..."

"No, I'm not! In fact, I got one right now!" He dug into his pocket. He pulled out a few rings, a crystalline bracelet, a piece of chalk, 9 Deku Nuts and a purple shard. After a few more seconds of digging, he pulled out a shiny object.

"Aha! Here it is!" The crystalline object fit right in Sonic's wooden hands. The jewel glow a faint yellow aura, illuminating the dark hideout with its shine. "Voila!"

"Whoa..." Tatl gazed at the jewel. Her eyes glistened under the emerald's glow. "Can I touch it?"

"Go ahead." Sonic tossed the emerald over to her. "Don't worry. It won't hurt."

She caught the emerald and gazed at it. As she held the jewel, a strange feeling ran through her body. It filled her with a positive, almost joyful, feeling. As she gazed at the emerald, she cracked a little smile at the jewel's brilliance. "Wow..."

"Oh yeah," said Sonic as he picked up his stuff and put it away. "When I attain all of the Emeralds, I can transform into Super Sonic. In said form, I can fly around and unleash devastating attacks. However, I can only stay in the form for only a few minutes before reverting to normal."

"Interesting..." She tossed the jewel over to Sonic. "Here, catch."

"Thanks," he said as he grabbed and put the emerald away.

"All right, now that we know where the Skull Kid is, let's go ask around the Clock Tower. Maybe we'll learn something."

"Got it, let's roll!"

They carefully crossed over the water and made their way out of the hideout. As they walked through South Clock Town, they noticed a Deku Scrub flying in from the South Gate.

The strange Deku fellow flew down to a Deku Flower and entered it. A few second, it came out and put on a hat. "This is my private property. Don't try using it when I'm not."

"Okay…?" Sonic backed up a bit from the strange Deku fellow. "Let's go, Tatl."

As the duo started to leave, the Deku fellow let out a short sigh. "I've already sold out of my wares, and the carnival hasn't even begun..."

Sonic stopped in his tracks and turned back to the Deku fellow. "Wait, so you're a salesman?"

"Yep, I'm thinking of closing up shop so I can buy a gift for my wife and return to her in my village. I've heard that a stone called the Moon's Tear shines brighter than any other in the land!"

Sonic turned to Tatl and whispered into her ear, "The Chaos Emeralds are shinier." She shrugged her shoulders in response.

"If you've got one, I'd really like to get it from you. My wife would love it!"

"Hmm. Well, if really want it..." Sonic reached into his pockets and pulled out the Moon's Tear he found from before. "I just happen to come across it earlier today!"

The Deku Salesman, after seeing the beautiful stone, squealed and jumped in joy. "That stone! You must hand it over to me, young sir!

"Hmm..." Sonic stroked his chin and juggled the stone. "I don't know... I mean, this IS a beautiful stone, mind you. But, if I just give it to you, what will I get in return?" He raised his eyebrow and flashed a little smirk. "Hmm?"

The Deku Salesman stood silently for a few seconds, and then snapped his fingers."I know just the thing!" He reached into his Deku Flower, saying "If you give me the Moon's Tear, in exchange," He pulled out a big brown scroll of paper."I'll give you my spot here, Deku Flower included! Deal?"

"Hmm..." He walked up and inspected the scroll of paper, chin stroking. After a few seconds of thinking it over, he backed up and nodded. "OK." He tossed the Moon's Tear over to the Deku Salesman. "Here you go."

"Here YOU go." The Deku Salesman handed Sonic the paper. Written on it was all the information pertaining to the specific spot he attained.

"Cool, a deed to an extremely small part of town." Sonic looked up and let out a sigh of exasperation. "Perfect."

"You really helped me out!" The Deku Salesman stared at the Moon's Tear. He put it in his bag and smiled. "Now I have the perfect souvenir for my wife! She hasn't set eyes on a jewel like this in a very long time. The Title Deed for this spot should be in high demand among Deku Scrubs, but you already know that. If you don't need it anymore, you can always sell it!"

The Deku Salesman dove in the Deku Flower. A few seconds afterwards, he launched himself into the air, bags of supplies in tow. He floated over to the South Gate and out of the town.

"Well, now that that's out of the way." Sonic rolled the deed up and stored it away in his pocket. "Now what do we do?"

"Let's keep looking for the Skull Kid." Tatl flew over to the plant-boy. "He got to be around here somewhere." Together, they walked over to and up the flight of stairs to East Clock Town.

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Alright, after mulling it over for the past couple days, I've decided to make this topic into a general thread where I can show off all of my works. For instance, let's start with Mischief Makers: A Cybot's Tale.

This one started as a self-imposed challenge. See, for those who don't know of the original game, Mischief Makers' story made about as much sense as a Dada art piece. Sure, the gameplay and everything was aces, but again, the game's story made absolutely no sense for the most part. Basically, I want to see if I could make the story more... sensical. You know, something that has a more logical flow to it. So, here's the main point of this story: to retell the story of Mischief Makers in a more straightforward narrative. Here's a courtesy link for those interested, but for those who are on the fence on this, here's the first chapter:

 

Ah, this is quite a sight to behold…

 

A bright-yellow sun rose high over the land of Clancer, its rays shining down upon the vast, open landscape. Morning dew sparkled on the various trees and plants dotting the landscape as the sun's rays shined down onto the forest. Birds chirped in the trees and flowers swayed in the wind as butterflies darted from one petal to another. Hidden in the light of the morning sun, a massive house-like structure was held aloft high above the planet's surface via three huge rockets. Two long blade-like structures, connecting to huge green spheres, stood erect on the brick-red roof of the aircraft. Yellow as the sun it was basking in, the entrance of the aircraft was adorned with a face-like image consisting of two glass circles and a silver elongated triangle.

 

Inside the ship, an elderly man was silently staring out a closed window in a small room right by the entrance. The man had a stocky build, with a round belly and a thick, white beard not unlike that of Santa Claus. Round glasses adorning his face, he wore a white lab coat and green bandanna tied tightly on his head.

 

Gosh, I'm bored… the man thought, shaking his head, I came to this planet to unwind, and I can't even leave the ship...

 

Theo shifted his position and stared out the window, hoping to see his robot return soon. Outside he saw the beautiful landscape of Clancer; the bright, clear sky, the rolling hills, the vibrant green grass and trees that seemed to stretch for miles. Dotting the landscape were block-like temple structures with holes and grooves craved into them. Images that resembled a ghostly face adorned the structures, giving them a slightly quieting look to them that sent chills down Theo's spine.

 

As he stared out to the beautiful scenery, a rising feeling from his gut beckoned him to venture out into this new world. "And yet…" he sighed as he made his way back to his seat, "Marina told me to stay here 'til she's done scouting…"

 

With that, Theo let out another sigh as he sat back down. Hours has elapsed since he had last seen Marina. He had spent most of the time tinkering with his gadgets and nick-knacks he brought with him, watching his stories on the ship's intergalactic television, and had eaten most of the remaining food in the supply storage room. All he could do now was sit and wait for his robot, Marina, to return from the scouting.

 

Gosh, I'm getting tired… His eyelids grew heavy as he tried to stay upright on his seat, a huge plush pillow. Perhaps I should take a nap… until Marina comes back, anyway.

 

Suddenly, an odd laughter pierced through his drowsy state, and in a flash, Theo shot back up whipping his head around in alarm.

 

"Huh?" he uttered in confusion, "I have visitors already?"

 

Holding his hands up, he slowly trudged over to the entrance of the ship. Thoughts raced through his head as he walked ever so closer. "Was it Marina?" he thought, before shaking his head. "She couldn't have been back this early. It can't be the locals, either; if my calculations are correct, I should be over five hundred feet above the planet's surface!"

 

Reaching for the handle, he slid the door open, revealing that… no one was there?

 

"Huh?" He poked his head outside, flitting his eyes to and fro. "Where did they go?"

 

"BANZAI!!!"

 

Before he knew it, a strong blow struck his face, sending him flying back in the floor of the room.

 

"W…What the heck was that?" he screamed, furiously rubbing the back of his head. "Marina, did you do tha-!"

 

Just before he finished his sentence, a figure ran into the room. Theo turned his head to see the figure standing in front of his table.

 

The figure had an odd body shape: it consisted of a headless torso with rubbery skin, white as chalk, and shaped like a lightbulb. Its arms and legs were dark purple, and their shoulders appeared more like round spheres connecting the arms to the body. Its face bore a similar appearance to the faces adorning the temple structures, with piercing red eyes from within its sockets.

 

He slowly crawled his way backwards towards the other side of the room, trembling at the sight of the creature. "Wh-who are you?" he uttered, making his way to his feet.

 

After a second of silence, the creature started giggling and fell to the floor in a laughing fit. Amidst the giggling fit, it reached into its pocket and pulled out a handheld device. Raising it to its mouth, it yelled, "H-h-he's here! Get him!"

 

Suddenly, more of the mysterious creatures ran in the room through the sliding door, carrying all sorts of tools and weaponry.

 

Theo quickly spun around and ran for the entrance to the main laboratory as fast as his elderly frame could allow him to. As he reached the entrance, a loud cracking sound rang over his head. As he looked, more of the creatures jumped down on top of him. He fell to the floor with a loud thud as the creatures swarmed around. He tried to reach for the door, but they all slapped his hand away. Two of the creatures grabbed him and pulled him to his feet. Suddenly, two more of the creature and began to wrap thick ropes around him. He tried to squirm away from the attacks but the creatures overpowered him. Before he knew it, he was tightly bound from head to toe by the ropes.

 

As he looked on helplessly, the creatures began to run and jump around the room. They opened cabinet doors, swung off the lamps and destroyed most of the professor's equipment. Thoughts raced through his head as he saw the scene unfold. Who were these creatures and why were they doing this to him? Where on the planet was Marina?

 

Once they had finished vandalizing the room, the creatures ran back over to him, picked him up and carried him to the entrance of the ship. Looking outside, he could see a small fleet of ship hovering right in front of them. Some of the aircrafts were small and rounded ships that held a symbol emblazoned on their chassis that resembled their ghost-like faces.

 

One giant aircraft hovered right in front of the fleet. It looked like a red version of the creatures that attacked him, with green glowing eyes painted on the front. The pilot of the giant craft sat in a tube-like seat attached to the back of the giant aircraft. It bore a strong resemblance to the other creatures, except it had red limbs and eyes. On top of its silvery-white hair, it wore a four-pointed gold crown on his head with a blue jewel embedded in it. Whatever the creature was, it was clearly the leader of the vandals.

 

"Ah, Professor Theo Liteyears, I presume?" the red creature yelled. Its voice had a condescending, mocking tone to it that, going by its greeting alone, irritated Theo.

 

"Yes, sir!" one of the creatures yelled, saluting towards the red creature. "We've just found him completely unguarded, sir!"

 

"Perfect!" The red creature reached in its aircraft and, suddenly, one of the machine's arms shot forward and grabbed Theo in its crab-like pincers.

 

What is this? he thought, as the claws lifted him off his spaceship as if he was just a simple ball.

 

After a second of hanging in the air, the claws shot forward towards the red spaceship. As it reached the aircraft, it slowed to a halt, and then slowly, it hovered up to the top of the ship and lowered Theo down on top of it. After Theo was placed on the top of the giant aircraft by the claws, the red leader looked at him and laughed.

 

"Do you feel the power of the Great Empire, Professor?" the leader yelled mockingly. "You're coming with us!"

 

I've been captured by the Empire of Terror? Theo muffled in a frightened tone. Though he had never personally crossed them up until that point, he heard tales of their treachery and cruelty many times before from those who have. Just thinking about them sent chills down his spine.

 

The red leader put its hand to the side of its head. "Oh, sorry, what was that? Here, let me help you with that!" The leader reached down in its cockpit and pulled out a large knife. Theo, even being bound and gagged, jumped back in surprise, nearly falling off the ship. The leader pulled him back towards him and, in one quick slash, the rope around his mouth fell to the top of the ship.

 

"Now, what were you sayin'?" the leader said, putting the knife away.

 

"Wh-who the heck are you?" Theo stammered, still frightened by the strange creature.

 

The leader stopped laughing and said, "Oh, right, my apologies. I guess we should get the introductions out of the way." The leader lowered its "head" and continued, "My name is Marzen Clancer the 64th, a proud... well, Clancer!"

 

"What?" Theo gasped. "You're a Clancer?"

 

"Wow, nothing escapes you, eh, Professor?" Marzen replied, rolling his eyes. "Of course I'm a Clancer, you old geezer! This whole armada you see before ya is made up of Clancers! And guess what? I'm their leader! Their king! Their… as you Earthlings say, grand poobah!"

 

"W-well, what are you gonna do to me, then?"

 

Marzen began to chortle. "We, as in me and this armada, were ordered to take you to the Emperor; that's all we were told to do. Why he wants to see a schlub like you, I don’t know!"

 

Emperor…?

 

"However, what I do know for certain is that you'll have a horrible time with us on the way to Imperial HQ! Get ready to cry and scream because it's all downhill from here for you!"

 

Marzen reached in the cockpit and fired up the engine. The strange aircraft began to float higher upward and hover away from his spaceship.

 

"No!" Theo screamed, scared and in total disbelief of what was happening. "I refuse to have any part in your schemes!"

 

"Oh? And how do you plan on stopping me?" Marzen asked, wagging his finger dismissively. "One: you're all tied up! Two: you're in the company of my awesome armada, packing more weapons than you've ever seen, even on Earth! And three: in case you're planning on jumping, well, look below you! We're so high up, it's crazy! I'm sure your precious Marina wouldn't like seeing her daddy look like a pulpy pancake!"

 

With Marzen’s words in mine, Theo, with a sigh, finally conceded. What does the Emperor want with me? he thought as the craft carried him away. His life was in danger and there was only one person that could save him now. Theo did what he only could in his predicament...

 

"Marina! Where are you? Help me!"

 

Marzen laughed. "Told ya you'd be screaming! Get ready, Professor, 'cuz this is gonna be a bumpy ride!"

 

In the blink of an eye, the ship accelerated to full speed and zoomed off as Theo continued to shout.

 

"HELP ME, MARINA!"

 



Again, if you have any questions and constructive criticism, don't keep it a secret; fire away! It would be very much appreciated.

Also, can someone else please post something (that's on-topic)? I don't wan't to break any rules concerning multiple posting.

Edited by Komodin

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Again, if you have any questions and constructive criticism, don't keep it a secret; fire away! It would be very much appreciated.

Also, can someone else please post something (that's on-topic)? I don't wan't to break any rules concerning multiple posting.

Sure, I'll bite. But I have neither a question or constructive criticism to offer you, just a complement...or two. smile.png

I love how descriptive your sentences are. I can envision everything you mention as a picture as I read along. And you don't use too many words, making your work very easy and enjoyable to read.

Your style reminds me of the way that I used to write back in the day when I wrote fanfictions...ah good times. That's probably why I like it so much. Anyway, keep up the good work! Look forward to seeing more from you!

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Sure, I'll bite. But I have neither a question or constructive criticism to offer you, just a complement...or two. smile.png

I love how descriptive your sentences are. I can envision everything you mention as a picture as I read along. And you don't use too many words, making your work very easy and enjoyable to read.

Your style reminds me of the way that I used to write back in the day when I wrote fanfictions...ah good times. That's probably why I like it so much. Anyway, keep up the good work! Look forward to seeing more from you!

Gee, thanks, mon! Don't worry, there will be more stuff from me; in fact, providing that nothing major happens, Chapter Seven of The Blue Blur of Termina should be up in a few days.

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Gee, thanks, mon! Don't worry, there will be more stuff from me; in fact, providing that nothing major happens, Chapter Seven of The Blue Blur of Termina should be up in a few days.

Yay! Take your time in putting your work up here...I'm following this topic so I'll be notified when you post something again here. Oh, and you're welcome, by the way.

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Hey, guys, I'm almost done with Chapter 7 of The Blue Blur of Termina! Here's the first part of said chapter; if you want, tell me what you think of it!

Back in the Northern Park, they scoured the entirety of the huge playground in search of the wayward Jim. After spending over a half-hour of searching, they finally found the leader of the Bombers near the Northern Gate. However...

"What do you MEAN, 'you won't give me the password'?!"

Sonic the Hedgehog-turned-Deku Scrub found himself between a rock and a hard place. To his left, fluttered his temperamental fairy... “friend,” Tatl Beryllia. Arms locked in a tight fold, she was loudly shooting her mouth off at the leader. She was practically glaring daggers at him, with a ferocity Sonic hasn’t seen from anybody before, not even Knuckles and Amy. Her face glowed a bright red, giving off a threatening aura to her that made her seem almost devilish.

To his right, stood the supposed leader of the Bombers. Unlike him and Tatl, he was a human boy who looked to be no older than twelve or thirteen years old. Just like Alfred, he wore a brightly colored bandanna on his head, with a single tuft of reddish brown poking out from his forehead; however, his was a dark shade red, matching the color of Tatl’s current face. Unlike the fuming fairy, he was significantly calmer, shooting away at a purple balloon hovering over them with a peashooter. Even with Tatl angrily yelled at him, he barely acknowledged her presence.

Right in the middle of the one-sided shouting match, Sonic could only sigh. “Looks like we’re gonna be here for a while,” he thought, trying to tune out Tatl’s tirade, to no avail.

“How dare you even try to leave me out of something like that!” Tatl screamed, her face as red as a stop sign. “ Don’t you know how long I’ve been in this stupid group?! Over five freakin’ years, that’s what! I’ve been here longer than you were, you little twerp! I demand you give me that stupid password right now, Jim! Right freakin’ now!

The bandanna boy, Jim, paused his shooting just long enough to give her a blank stare. “You’re kidding, right?” His voice, a somewhat squeaky pitch, carried an air of contempt. Sonic could tell that he isn’t exactly in good terms with Tatl, either.

No, I’m not ‘kidding’!” she yelled, balling her fists. “I want that password, Jim! Stop screwing around, I actually freakin’ need it!”

“Why the heck should I?” Stuffing his peashooter back in his pocket, he walked up to the hovering pixie and stated, “You have been absolutely nothing but trouble for the Bombers ever since you joined, especially when you forced us to accept that imp friend of yours several years back! You haven’t done a single thing to help anyone here; heck, you can’t even help the Bomb Shop Lady with her supplies without asking for some sort of reward!”

“What does that have to do with what I’m talking about?!”

“It does have something to do with why you don’t have that new password! Frankly, Tatl, you’re just a pain to be around! You’re mean, you’re bossy, you’re whiny, and you’re always shooting your mouth off when you don’t get your way! Me and the guys are sick and tired of your nonsense! In fact, now that you’ve reminded me, the only reason why we put up with you for as long as we did was because of Lady Venus!”

Tatl just glared angrily at Jim as he spoke, fish balled up and turning red themselves. Sonic could only smirk to himself, watching this all go down. “Well, somebody had to say it...” he thought, watching Tatl glow a brighter red in fury.

“So,” Jim continued, “me and the guys took a vote a couple days ago; as of right now, both you and that Skull Kid are officially out of the Bombers’ Secret Society of Justice!”

Tatl was left in a stammering furor. She babbled and sputtered, clenching her fists so tightly, Sonic could hear her knuckles pop. After a few seconds of angered gibberish, she finally screamed, “Fine! You know what?! Screw your group! Screw each and every last one of your members! I can be more than well off by myself! In fact, I never even liked your stupid group, anyways! Helping others... bah! What’s the point of helping others if all you get for it is a stupid ‘Thank you!’?! Not even a single rupee; just a single congrats!”

“Hey!” Jim angrily got up to her face; it was clear that she struck a nerve with him. “I have you know that the people of this town actually appreciate our help! In fact, Tatl, you could stand to learn some humility!”

“Humility?! How dare you assume that I’m anything less than important! I’m Tatl freakin’ Beryllia, daughter of the lovely Lady Vee, who made this damn town! I demand importance, you hear me?!”

“That does not give you the rights to treat others like dirt! It’s called basic decency, Tatl! You could stand to learn that, too!”

Now practically outshining the Sun in her red aura, Tatl was fit to be tied. Raising a fist, also glowing as red as a tomato, she yelled, “You little son of a bi-!”

Knowing where it would likely head if he didn’t intervene, Sonic finally said, “Hey, um, guys?”

Tatl and Jim, with almost-perfect symmetry, both turned to Sonic and yelled, “WHAT?!

Taken aback by the sudden outburst, Sonic stammered, ”Well, uh, I was just thinking...”

“Well,” Tatl said, her skin color slowly going back to its normal color, “spill it, Dek! What’re you thinking?”

“Perhaps, uh,” Sonic continued, scratching the back of his wooden head, “I could join the Bombers? You know, so I can at least get the password?”

Tatl and Jim just stared at the hedgehog-turned-deku in abject befuddlement, shooting glances at each other. After a few seconds of total silence between them, they suddenly start to chuckle.

“Hm?” Sonic replied, eying the fairy and human in confusion.

The chuckles almost immediately grew into full-blown guffaws. Tatl rolled along the dirt ground of the park, laughing uproariously. Jim barely stood his ground while guffawing like a hyena. Sonic just stood there in confusion by the weird display. As the laughter went on and on, it started to annoy him.

“Hey!” Sonic yelled, tapping his foot angrily. “What’s so darn funny?!”

You?” Tatl shouted in between gasps and guffaws. “Join the Bombers?!” Before she could continue, she went right back into her giggling fit, rocking back and forth in uproarious glee.

“Look, no offense, Dek, or whatever your name is,” Jim said, barely retaining enough control to calm himself down. “But, you’re a Deku Scrub! You’re, like, weaker than an anemic chuchu!” He, too, went back into a giggling fit.

As the laughing riot continued on, it really started to wear on Sonic’s nerves. Clenching his fists, he yelled, ”Will you stop already?! That wasn’t even remotely funny!”

His words, however, fell on deaf ears as the giggling fairy and human went on, completely ignoring the deku scrub boy. After a few more seconds of the display, Sonic finally couldn’t take it anymore.

Head faced skyward, he finally screamed, “I said, ‘ST-’” Before he could finish what he screamed, a huge green orb shot out of his mouth. It speed off like a bullet, barreling right at the purple balloon. As quickly as it exited from his mouth, it struck the balloon with a loud crack. The balloon instantly exploded like a shotgun blast, rattling the air with a powerful shock wave. Shreds of torn balloon pieces and sparkly confetti rained down, covering the ground below it in burnt remnants.

Sonic was left aghast in horror. Did he actually just do what he think he did? Looking around his immediate area, it was clear that he wasn’t the only one who saw the blast. The air went dead silent, the laughs from before were a distant memory. Everyone, from the Town Guard posted there to the other children playing in the ground, stared blankly at the deku-hedgehog. Even Tatl and Jim, who were previously too busy laughing like hyenas to notice Sonic, were left mouth agape.

Suddenly in the spotlight, Sonic couldn’t help but shrug his shoulders sheepishly. “Did I do that...?”

Tatl nodded blankly. “Yeah... you did...”

Edited by Komodin

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Hey, guys, I'm almost done with Chapter 7 of The Blue Blur of Termina! Here's the first part of said chapter; if you want, tell me what you think of it!

I'm sorry, I read this a few days ago and I forgot to get back to you about it. Once again I enjoyed what I read, as continue to envision everything that you described. Keep putting out those details! It really makes the reading come alive! Oh, and I got a good laugh out of this chapter too. biggrin.png

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Hey, guys, Chapter 7 of The Blue Blur of Termina is now available to read! If you want, tell me what you think of it! smile.png

I just finished reading the rest of it and I loved it! Props to you for making a game of hide-and-seek interesting with all the details! Also I loved the Sonic Colors' cutscene reference with Tatl shopping and getting a bite to eat...I saw what you did there! tongue.png

Oh, is it me or does Tatl need to be slapped?! I think she does...anyway, once again good job! Looking forward to next chapter, which would be Chapter 8, right?

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I just finished reading the rest of it and I loved it! Props to you for making a game of hide-and-seek interesting with all the details! Also I loved the Sonic Colors' cutscene reference with Tatl shopping and getting a bite to eat...I saw what you did there! tongue.png

Thanks for the review, mon! Yeah, I pretty much had to do it; the opportunity to make such a reference was far too golden to pass up, y'know!

Oh, is it me or does Tatl need to be slapped?! I think she does...

Oh, if you think she's bad now, just wait until the later chapters roll around. Just sayin'...

]anyway, once again good job! Looking forward to next chapter, which would be Chapter 8, right?

Correct, and it will be up in a couple days! Again, thanks for the little review; with me, feedback is very much appreciated!

Edited by Komodin

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Thanks for the review, mon! Yeah, I pretty much had to do it; the opportunity to make such a reference was far too golden to pass up, y'know!

You're welcome! Yeah, the Sonic Colors reference I thought was pretty clever tongue.png

Oh, if you think she's bad now, just wait until the later chapters roll around. Just sayin'...

Oh really?! Wow...I'm definitely gonna have to check that out!

Correct, and it will be up in a couple days! Again, thanks for the little review; with me, feedback is very much appreciated!

Cool, looking forward to it! And again, you're welcome! smile.png

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Alright, guys, here's a snippet of Chapter 8 for The Blue Blur of Termina. If you want, tell me what you think of it.

“Their hideout is in a SEWER?!”

Darkness surrounded the baffled Sonic and Tatl; only the torches dotting the walls and the fairy girl’s light kept them from having to wander in complete darkness. Only the sounds of rushing water and ticking acquainted them. They stood on a stone balcony, overlooking an abyssal sea of darkness as far as the eye can see. To their right, a brick path, barely lit by torches and interrupted by gaps into the grimy water below, stretched on into eternity. To their left, a simple torch, flickering a bright red light in the pitch-black room. A long river flowed through right in front, black as the room around them. The air carried a slight chill, a huge contrast from the moderately warm air outside.

“Okay, what the heck?” Sonic said, backing away from the nearby torch and the walls. “I know us boys like to mess with dirty stuff at times, but this is ridiculous!”

“I know!” Tatl replied, clamping her nose shut with her left hand, while balancing her book with her right. It was now that Sonic was glad that he didn’t have a nose as a Deku.

“Are you sure that this is the only other way to the observatory?” Sonic asked, peering into the black water. Not a single sign of life was present in the briny canal.

“Yes, this is the only way!” Tatl said, gasping. “This path is, like, decades old!”

“Don’t the town guards know about this? I mean, with a pretty blatant chink in their defense like that, I’m surprised the town isn’t inundated with beasties!”

“Nope,” Tatl said, “but then again, besides the Bombers, only me, Tael, the Skull Kid and Shikashi know about this particular passageway.”

“Alright, then, which way do we go?”

Balancing the book on her right hand again, she pointed forward to the stone pathway. “That’s the way to the observatory,” she shouted, and she started to flutter down into the darkness. “Let’s go! Time’s a wastin’!”

Sonic sighed reluctantly. “Right.” Walking up to the dark river, he looked forward. The way to the rest of the pathway was segmented into several small “islands” with the gaps filled by the poisonous-looking water that flowed through. Tatl floated over the islands like they were nothing to her, carefully balancing the book in her hands. One of the gaps of water were right in front of him. Peering to his left, he saw that the river flowed in from a huge grating just a stone’s throw away from him.

“Well,” Sonic muttered, gulping. “Guess there’s only one way to do this...”

Stepping as far back as he could, he readied himself: standing in place, legs splayed. He balled his fists, eying the nearest “island”. “Ready...”

“Hurry up already, Dek!” echoed Tatl’s voice.

Growling to himself, Sonic yelled, “GO!” And with that, he took off into a sprint. Though not nearly as fast as his normal form, he made it back to the river in seconds. Just as he reached the very edge of the stone balcony, he closed his eyes, crouched forward and leapt as high as he could towards the near island. He felt the wind rushing through his leaf-quills as he soared over the stagnant canal water. After soaring through the air for a few seconds, he landed feet-first on a hard structure with a loud thud.

Opening his eyes, he looked back and gasped. In just a single bound, he had not only cleared the rivers, he also made it over the “islands”, landing on the stone pathway leading to the observatory.

Damn, Dek...” Sonic looked forward and saw Tatl, mouth agape with a slight smile. “That was awesome! How did you do that?!”

Sonic shrugged, grinning sheepishly. “I leaped.”

Tatl smirked. “Hm, if this is how you’re like as a Deku Scrub, then I’m just dyin’ to see how you are in your regular form! I just might actually give you that... reward, after all...” She gave him a little wink.

“Oh, cool, but let’s wait until we get that Skull Kid before we discuss that, hm?”

“Lead the way, Dek...” she said with a giggle.

“Gladly,” Sonic replied, and he started to march on down the pathway, Tatl fluttering close. He couldn’t help but grin to himself; even in his Deku form, he could still pull off awesome stunts. He was on top of the world; not even the gritty and drab atmosphere of the hideout dampened his glee.

As seconds turned to minutes, however, the high started to slowly wear off. The longer he looked around, trying to fins something interesting to look at, the more bored he felt. The dirt-brown, muddy stone passage stretching on into the abyss, the dawdling river of stagnant water off to the side, all barely lit by small torches lining the walls. Only the hummingbird-like flapping from Tatl’s wings kept the travel from being a completely silent monotony.

How long is this gonna go on?” Sonic thought, trudging along in the utter monotony of the sewers.

Minutes soon turned to hours. Throughout the whole trip down the seemingly-endless tunnel, Sonic kept to himself, glancing the unchanging looks of the area. Looking back, he saw Tatl fluttering close behind, reading the book while using her strange glow as a reading light. After a while, a growing sense of dread started to dwell inside Sonic. Looking up to the ceiling, he could help but sigh.

Really starting to miss sunlight right about now...” he thought.

Just as he started to yawn from the utter boredom, a loud chattering sound suddenly rang out from above.

“Huh?” He came to a halt, looking around him for the source of the noise.

“What’s up, Dek?” Tatl said, hovering to his side.

“Hey, you heard that sound?” Sonic replied, head flitting to and fro.

“Um... what sound?” Tatl asked, looking around herself. “Can you describe it?”

“It was a strange, chattering sound...” Sonic muttered, “kinda like someone rustling their hands in a bundle of sticks. ”

“Bundles o-” Tatl gasped. “Oh, no...”

“What, what’s wrong?” Sonic asked, and Tatl held a hand to his mouth.

“Look, Dek, we have to get to the observatory fast!” Tatl replied sternly. “We might’ve just landed ourselves in a whole mess of trouble now...!”

“Well, what are we waiting for?!” Sonic said, and started to sprint. “Let’s get moving!”

Tatl started to flutter speedily beside him. “Right behind ya!”

As they ran, the strange chittering sound grew louder, echoing throughout the dark hallway. His heart pulsed a mile a minute as he sped along. Surprisingly, even Tatl looked scared, muttering something quietly as she clutched the book close to her chest. As seconds became minutes, the chittering, once barely louder than the cracking of the torches, was now loudly echoing all around him. His vision started to go foggy, his heart pumping as fast as he could run.

After a few more minutes of running, he started to see a stone wall slowly come into view. A huge metal grating was off to the side, rising from deep below the river. A bright red light emanated far off to the right of the wall.

“We’re almost there, Dek!” Tatl shouted, panting deeply. “We just have to get over the-”

Suddenly, a huge black shadow jumped down from the ceiling, uttering an unearthly chittering howl. Screaming as loudly as their bodies could allow, Sonic and Tatl both leapt back, landing butt-first on the cold, dirty stone ground.

“What the hell is that?!” Sonic screamed, clutching tightly on his wooden chest.

He breathed in loud, audible gasps as the shadowy creature slowly came into view. It was a spider; a spider whose size could rival even the largest thoroghbreds. It had beady, little red eyes that almost seemed to glow in the darkness of the sewer. Its eight spindly legs, as black as night, were covered in sharp spine-like hairs. Greenish venom dripped from its fangs, splashing down hard on the stone floor. What gave Sonic the most pause was its abdomen: it had a bony, stark-white shell that looked like a melted human skull. The “eyeholes” of the skull seemed to emanate a red light, almost as if it was an extra set of eyes for the arachnid.

“It’s a Skulltula...” Tatl muttered, jittering in place and clutching the book.

“A what?!” Sonic yelled, eying the scared fairy girl.

Using her arm as a balance, she flipped open the massive book. Flipping through the page as frantically as she could, she finally came to a stop and yelled, “This!

Looking at the page, he gasped. A photograph of a massive arachnid graced the page, looming over a helpless girl, followed by columns of characters that he couldn’t quite read.

“These spiders are really dangerous, Dek!” Tatl said, closing the book with a loud clap. “If we don’t kill this thing off fast, it’s gonna kill and eat US!

“Okay... ?!” Sonic muttered. If he had teeth right now, they would be chattering like a jackhammer. “How do we kill this thing?! It’s as big as a horse!”

“W-well,” Tatl stuttered, the skulltula creeping closer to her, “it has that hard skull shell on its abdomen, so you can’t just strike it there, I guess...”

“So, how DO you kill it?!” Sonic screamed, backing away from the leering skulltula.

“Its underbelly...” Tatl yelled, clutching her book tight, “We gotta flip this thing over and attack its underbelly!”

“Got it. You take the back; I got the front!” Sonic yelled, and he dashed over to the skulltula. Diving at the screeching arachnid, he grabbed it by its fangs.

“Gotcha!” Sonic yelled, grabbing the bony fangs as tight as his little Deku hands could allow him. Green venom started to seep into his hands, coating his bracelets in a snot-like gunk. He eyed the goop nervously, while thanking himself for letting Lady Venus heal him up; otherwise, he would’ve been in a far more graver situation than he was already in.

“Hey, Dek!” echoed Tatl’s voice from behind the hulking spider. “I got this thing by its web-spitty bits! Now, on the count of three, we flip this sonuvabee over into the water! Ready?!”

Getting a tight hold on the skulltula, Sonic yelled, “Yeah, let’s go!”

One...

Two...

THREE!

And, with one mighty, almost-synchronized shove, Sonic, along with the help of Tatl, forced the skulltula to flip right into the brackish sewer water below. To his, and presumably Tatl’s surprise, the arachnid was much lighter than it appeared, flipping over as if it was a simple playing card. Landing in the water with a loud splash, it thrashed about in the stagnant sewer water, sending its legs spiralling around it.

“Let’s get this BASTARD!” Tatl yelled as she, without a second glance, hopped on top of the skulltula’s underbelly, pulled out her knife, and started to slash at its legs.

Right behind ya!” Sonic shouted, and leapt down on the arachnid’s abdomen. They both went to work on the vulnerable spider, slashing away and stomping at its soft innards. Globs of a clearish liquid came pouring out of the wounded skulltula, spilling into the sewer water like a burst dam. As Sonic stomped at the unprotected undersides, the translucent liquid splashed against the stone walls, giving them a sticky appearance. The stick-like legs each fell straight into the water with every slice from Tatl’s knife. After a few seconds of the no-holds-barred beatdown, the arachnid, now emptied of its entrails, stopped moving. The skulltula was no more.

Climbing back onto the relatively dry ground of the stone pathway, Sonic and Tatl were sprawled on their back floor, panting deeply. They were both covered in the skulltula’s remains, especially Sonic, who was covered head-to-toe in its entrails. Looking over to the dead arachnid, even while being dead exhausted, Sonic couldn’t help but smile like an idiot. It was the first bit of action he got since the Dark Gaia incident...and it felt good!

“Well, Dek,” Tatl said, rolling to her side while breathing in deeply, “we’re soakin’ wet, we’re completely covered in skulltula guts, we reek like hell...”

“But, we’re alive...” Sonic said happily.

Tatl gave a thumbs-up, replying, “Hell yeah...”

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Alright, guys, here's a snippet of Chapter 8 for The Blue Blur of Termina. If you want, tell me what you think of it.

Another finely detailed chapter! It was a bit graphic to me, but I liked it still. I have yet to find anything to be critical about in your writing, so keep up the good work! smile.png

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Hey, guys! Just to let you all know, Chapter 8 for The Blue Blur of Termina is now available to read! As always, if you want, tell me what you think of it!

Once again I love all the details! I can so see the colorful staircase with the way you described it...absolutely beautiful! Another thing I like is how spaced out your paragraphs are. You don't have a whole bunch of sentences in a single paragraph, making it very easy to read. Again, keep up the good work! Can't wait to find out what happens next! smile.png

Oh, I just thought of something: where are Chapters 2 through 6? I've only seen Chapters 1, 7 and 8 on here...

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The exaggeration and detail of tearing that skulltulla to shreds... haven't we all felt that when that thing popped down the first time? xD

And holy shit, that about-face scene was plain fucking creepy. o_o;;; Can't take horror material well.

Masochist as I am on that part, can't wait for more. xD I love BBOT!

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Aw, thanks for the compliments, guys! It really does make me happy seeing you all enjoy my story so far! happy.png

Oh, I just thought of something: where are Chapters 2 through 6? I've only seen Chapters 1, 7 and 8 on here...

Well, I wanted to post them here as well, but I'm afraid that they might make this page too long to read through, even if they were spoilered. However, you can read those chapters through this link here. Feel free to give me your thoughts on them!

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Aw, thanks for the compliments, guys! It really does make me happy seeing you all enjoy my story so far! happy.png

Well, I wanted to post them here as well, but I'm afraid that they might make this page too long to read through, even if they were spoilered. However, you can read those chapters through this link here. Feel free to give me your thoughts on them!

*Sees my last post here was May 23rd...* Has it been that long since I replied to this topic?!

Anyway, thanks for giving me the link to the other chapters! After putting it off time and time again I finally sat down and read not only Chapters 2 through 6, which I never read, but also re-reading the chapters that you had up here before. So basically I read the whole story so far. Sorry it took me so long!

I have nothing new to say about your story, other than what I have been mentioning before. I'm getting a movie-like vibe to your story, as you describe everything so well, it's like I see a visual playing in my mind as I read along, if that makes any sense. I'm enjoying it very much! How is chapter 9 coming along? Looking forward to it as well as more chapters from you! smile.png

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*Sees my last post here was May 23rd...* Has it been that long since I replied to this topic?!

Anyway, thanks for giving me the link to the other chapters! After putting it off time and time again I finally sat down and read not only Chapters 2 through 6, which I never read, but also re-reading the chapters that you had up here before. So basically I read the whole story so far. Sorry it took me so long!

Aw, that's okay. At least you're up to speed.

I have nothing new to say about your story, other than what I have been mentioning before. I'm getting a movie-like vibe to your story, as you describe everything so well, it's like I see a visual playing in my mind as I read along, if that makes any sense. I'm enjoying it very much! How is chapter 9 coming along? Looking forward to it as well as more chapters from you! smile.png

Chapter 9 is coming along smoothly; barring some weird event, like my computer crapping out on me, it should be up in a few days. Once again, thank you for reading and giving me feedback on my story. This may sound a bit sappy, but... seeing others enjoy my stories make me happy. smile.png

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Chapter 9 is coming along smoothly; barring some weird event, like my computer crapping out on me, it should be up in a few days. Once again, thank you for reading and giving me feedback on my story. This may sound a bit sappy, but... seeing others enjoy my stories make me happy. smile.png

Don't worry, you don't sound sappy, not at all. Glad to hear that people enjoying your stories makes you happy...reading such an awesome story makes me happy, that's for sure! So I guess we are even then being happy and all with this. happy.png Also glad to hear that Chapter 9 is almost done...looking forward to it!

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Hey, guys, I'm planning on doing a little rewrite for Chapter 6 of The Blue Blur of Termina. While the general events will remain the same, I'm gonna give some more details; reading it over, I can't help but feel that the prose in it is a little too beige for my liking.

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Hey, guys, I'm planning on doing a little rewrite for Chapter 6 of The Blue Blur of Termina.

My initial thought: Nooooo! I thought Chapter 6 was fine the way it was! Why?!

Sees the answer to my question:

I'm gonna give some more details;

Oh really? Well, disregard that mini rant from me that I just did then, lol. That's cool as you already know that I love details! The more, the better! Looking forward to seeing a revamped Chapter 6! smile.png

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