What's the Point of Taking Things Away?

[DarkOverord]

Seconded. That's a purely societal view, and, as mentioned, over-generalized.

Well in America where a crap GPA stays with you for life, and in Britain where unless you get more qualification than GCSE's. It's true. I have the council estate I live on to tell me that.

[Eileanach]

When I was younger and at school I did very well but if I ever did something "wrong" (i.e. told a big lie or whatever) my mum would punish me but it wouldn't be taking things away from me, it would be "bed without supper", a slap or I need to do chores for a week and on top of the initial punishment I'd get a "talking to".

I wouldn't say I was raised strictly because I was raised fairly, if I fucked up I got taught a lesson. Simple as. Your parents are trying their best to teach you that if you start failing left right and centre you are not going to get nice things. In their eyes why should you get nice things when they aren't getting the pleasure of seeing you succeed?

[The Conductor]

When I was a kid, you were LUCKY if you only got stuff taken away. If you fucked up you got slapped. Sorry Nights but it seems to be you're just being a moapy brat, try studying .

But yeah, taking away the consoles is prolly to make you study.

[Tamaki Kawazoe <3]

When I was a kid, you were LUCKY if you only got stuff taken away. If you fucked up you got slapped. Sorry Nights but it seems to be you're just being a moapy brat, try studying .

But yeah, taking away the consoles is probably to make you study.

Actually, I did get spankings a lot when I was 8 and under. Every time I misbehaved I got like 10 spankings in a row. Which hurt a lot. I do study a lot, I normally do it when my parents are away or in the living room so they never know I DO. But the thing is, I normally tend to get BETTER grades on tests by NOT studying.

EDIT:But I think my parents got overboard with the grades. They check my grades every half hour on the internet and talk about homework and grades the WHOLE day. I think they get a bit TOO paranoid with my grades. I mean seriously, checking my grades every HALF HOUR.

Edited May 15, 2009 by Nights

[Mollfie]

I think it's a case of "If we take away the Wii, hopefully they'll use that time they would be playing games to study"?

But I have no idea because my parents have never punished me for anything. If I got a bad grade or upset them then they'd just talk to me about it and we'd come to a compromise and try to sort out the problem.

[Tamaki Kawazoe <3]

I think it's a case of "If we take away the Wii, hopefully they'll use that time they would be playing games to study"?

But I have no idea because my parents have never punished me for anything. If I got a bad grade or upset them then they'd just talk to me about it and we'd come to a compromise and try to sort out the problem.

But you see, that's what my PARENTS do. They don't do anything, it's practically my Grandma who does all this stuff. It's like she has the most power. Kids actually make fun of me because she usually punishes me.

[TheGerkuman]

But I have no idea because my parents have never punished me for anything. If I got a bad grade or upset them then they'd just talk to me about it and we'd come to a compromise and try to sort out the problem.

Wait, you never got punished for anything? Wow, I'm suprised at that; most people I know who never get punished turned into spoilt brats. (And you're obviously nothing like a spoilt brat, of course. ) Edited May 15, 2009 by Skullivan Gerk

[Tamaki Kawazoe <3]

Wait, you never got punished for anything? Wow, I'm suprised at that; most people I know who never get punished turned into spoiled brats. (And you're obviously nothing like a spoiled brat, of course. )

I know your talking to Molfie most likely but I have to say this. I am a really nice kid and am not a spoiled brat. I AM spoiled with some good things like video game systems and my mom and TEACHERS even give me this lecture every time saying"Be glad, your not a homeless person who doesn't have things like that". But I don't let all this get to my head, I DO in fact study. But like I said earlier, I normally don't LIKE to study otherwise I do worse than I do with studying.

[TheGerkuman]

And I never accused you of being a spoilt brat either. Any assumption you make about my statements says more about the way you see yourself, than it says about me.

[Mollfie]

^ I don't deal well with people shouting at me, so I always avoid that by talking and trying to sort it out. So that's how my parents dealt with me, they shouted at my sisters though lol. It's not like I never did anything wrong, of course I did! My dad has the idea that you should tell people your opinion, then if they don't listen to you it's their own fault, and just be there to pick them up when they fall.

I've never understood why it's so hard to just listen to your parents, they're not being mean because they like it lol (well most parents anyway). What's so hard about telling them where you are and who you're with? I used to hang around with some shady people but I'd still tell me parents that I was at soandsos house with whoever. If they wanted me home by 11, I'd be home by 11. etc etc.

By doing that as a kid/teenager it's meant that as I got older they trusted me more and more so then I could do what I wanted and they didn't mind. My parents trusted me. My friends have always found it really weird that I think of my parents as being my friends and my parents, not just some authority figure trying to ruin my fun. They're not, they just care about you and want the best for you.

So...your parents talk to you, and you Granny punishes you? That's something that only your parents can sort out, and that's only if they don't like her getting involved.

Edited May 15, 2009 by Mollfie

[Tamaki Kawazoe <3]

And I never accused you of being a spoiled brat either. Any assumption you make about my statements says more about the way you see yourself, than it says about me.

Ah, but you see, the reason I am only a bit ticked off that my systems (Xbox 360 mostly, I never play my Wii

), is because towards the end of school I look forward to come home and play a bit of Unleashed or some good old Sonic 1 just to take my stress away and just relax. It was one thing that keeps me under control. About a whole hour or so of playing makes me be relaxed again and then I do a bit of studying, then eat, and then play a bit more and go to bed. It is one of the things that keeps me a nice guy because it lowers my stress and anger if kids pick on me.

EDIT:But you see Molfie, my mom is a bit..How you say, over protective? She never let's me outside because she is afraid I will get kidnapped or get run over by a car. I can't even go to a friend's house or anything. She is afraid I will get hurt by their parent or something if they are mean. So the only thing I COULD do is play games, study, eat, play games, and then go to bed. That's my life, because my mom doesn't even want me leaving the yard. My grandma is the only one who will take me out places.

Edited May 15, 2009 by Nights

[Mollfie]

Nights, if school is stressing you out that much then maybe you should talk to your parents? Maybe that's the problem here?

[Tamaki Kawazoe <3]

Nights, if school is stressing you out that much then maybe you should talk to your parents? Maybe that's the problem here?

I already tried to, they keep telling me"Just ignore the bully's and do what you have to do". Which I find kind of a lazy excuse just to do their own things. Sometimes they get detailed about it but that's all they really say. I can't talk to the counselor in the school because I don't know how to make an appointment with our grade's counselor. So I just have to try my best to ignore all of this stuff.

[Mollfie]

Usually if you want an appointment you just go to the counselor and ask for one don't you? Or the main office maybe?

EDIT: Just saw you're 15. I don't know what to say really, some parents are over protective and the only thing you can do is either go along with it, go out anyway which will upset her or wait until you can leave home lol.

Edited May 15, 2009 by Mollfie

[Tamaki Kawazoe <3]

Usually if you want an appointment you just go to the counselor and ask for one don't you? Or the main office maybe?

How old are you btw? Just cos if you're 13 then I can understand your mum being pretty protective of you still (though she does seem a little extreme) but if you're 18 then it's just weird to me lol

You have to make an appointment to see the counselor at our schools. But to answer your other question I am 15 and 1/2. I am also not allowed to watch rated R movies or play rated M games. I also can't talk to people who swear, otherwise my grandma removes them from my friends list on Skype , MSN or AIM. I do wish I had some more freedom considering how old I am.

EDIT:My mom doesn't want me to leave home till I am about 21 years old. I think she is going over the top.

Edited May 15, 2009 by Nights

[Mollfie]

All I can say again is to just talk to them, seriously and calmly about how you feel. If they don't listen, then leave it a little while and try again.

21 is a bit high to me, but then I left home at 18 to go to Uni, and my sisters moved out at 16 and 18 to live with their boyfriends so I dunno...depends I guess.

If you want to move out though you'll need to either go to college or get a job, both of which mean doing well at school. So more studying!

[Roarey Raccoon]

Well in America where a crap GPA stays with you for life, and in Britain where unless you get more qualification than GCSE's. It's true. I have the council estate I live on to tell me that.

I'm gonna have to apologise for going off-topic here but I'd really prefer not to let this little point go without responding to it XP. The fact that exam grades are viewed as such essential foundations for a future in society is less to do with the reality of it and more to do with the sort of narrow view society has these days. Poor areas in particular are awash with a sense of hopelessness that's so ingrained it's barely seen as abnormal. People are accustomed to failure and their position in society and high grades are seen as the only way out. There are many ways to live and be happy, it's just a matter of circumstance and the values prevailent today that lend special importance to academic achievement. What is viewed as successful in these times is unattainable by the majority, which is where the real problem starts.

I agree that doing well is indeed important and it opens doors for you and makes life easier, that is certainly true, but viewing success at school as the be-all and end-all is just a consequence of our current values and economic system rather than an objective view on life.

[TheGerkuman]

Then again, why should we not want to aim higher? I came to Uni to get a job in an industry that interests me. I don't expect to be rich, or famous, or anything like that, I just want a job that stimulates me in some way. Probably because I find it really hard to to the things I need to do, but don't want to do. XD

[Roarey Raccoon]

Then again, why should we not want to aim higher? I came to Uni to get a job in an industry that interests me. I don't expect to be rich, or famous, or anything like that, I just want a job that stimulates me in some way. Probably because I find it really hard to to the things I need to do, but don't want to do. XD

No reason to not aim higher, but remember that society as it is cannot function without a lot of people staying below. Many people have to be what is now considered unsuccessful. Would a university student get a job in waste disposal?

[Mollfie]

I think Roarey makes a good point. Plus going to University doesn't neccisarily mean that you're intelligent. I've met some really dumb people at Uni, and some very intelligent bin men.

But that's not to say that it's ok to slack off. Just do the best that you can do, that way you atleast know that you've tried and you can be proud of yourself for that.

Nights, all I can think of it what I've already said. I think that if you don't like how things are at school or home, talk to someone about it. Your parents, your gran, a teacher, a conselor. Just someone who can help.

[Roarey Raccoon]

I think Roarey makes a good point. Plus going to University doesn't neccisarily mean that you're intelligent. I've met some really dumb people at Uni, and some very intelligent bin men.

But that's not to say that it's ok to slack off. Just do the best that you can do, that way you atleast know that you've tried and you can be proud of yourself for that.

Nights, all I can think of it what I've already said. I think that if you don't like how things are at school or home, talk to someone about it. Your parents, your gran, a teacher, a conselor. Just someone who can help.

Last off-topic post I'm going to make here, but it's an interesting post anyway, I promise.

What if you want to slack off? What if you don't want to 'do your best'? Especially when you're young XP. You die at the end of this life, or are people forgetting? All of these questions are rhetorical so you don't need to answer them, but basically there's no reason to subscribe to a set of imposed values if you don't want to follow them. The rich elite of society want you to be productive and unquestioning, for obvious reasons, so that's why it's a cornerstone of our society. If you don't want to be a part of that then just don't, if it makes you happier XP. So yeah, it is okay to slack off, because you only get one life and it's for no fucker to tell you what to do with it.

[Mollfie]

What you're saying Roarey is completely true. I just don't like seeing people waste their talents, and by that I don't neccisarily mean academic talents. Aslong as you're happy, that's all that matters.

Edited May 15, 2009 by Mollfie

[HelenBaby]

I know plenty of people with worse GCSE grades than me (some who probably achieved none at all) who are currenty doing alot better than I am

[Indigo Rush]

My parents took my things away, punished me constantly and gave me the most absolute strict life ever, and even had me go to military school.

And you know what? I love them for it. You won't notice any change in your life until you're much older, but unless you fight off their discipline and rebel, you won't have any trouble understanding why they did what they did.

They've attempted to 'ween' me from Sonic for years, and when I didn't comply, and when my grades suffered as well as my self control, it was military school for me. It woke me up like a drunk in a cold shower; I've learned, if anything, how to control myself in college. I may not act it on here, but I'm a fairly respectable guy as opposed as to when I was 14 or 15.

I mean... unless your parents are in fact stupid and don't know what they're doing, then I have no explanation except to get out of there. My current parents took custody of me from my others when I was very young, and while I hated it then, I loved them later, because I understood how terrible parents they were.

In short... respect your parents. You'll be out of the house soon (I hope)

[Flyboy Fox]

You can mess up at school and still do well in life, but the point is you have to TRY. If school isn't working for you, but you've tried your best, then there are other avenues after you leave. But you need to have the right ethic.

I dropped out of school when I was 14, yet I'm in University now.