Scientists Create Gun That Physically Stops You From Talking

[Velotix von Skruviktorrius]

Source

Doom's BFG makes way for Japan's STFU

If you're like me, by this point in time you've probably already accumulated a long list of people who you wish you could just magically stop from ever speaking again. People like my Uncle Mortimer, that needling Protoss guy, and for those of you still trying to maintain the façade of the Matrix,

Well, good news, everyone! A scrappy team of researchers has just designed a weapon that physically stops its victims from speaking, and all of our evil dreams can finally come true (assuming we can get within 100 feet of the loudmouths). Thanks, Japan!

The gun, called the "SpeechJammer" (because everybody knows that hip scientists don't use the spacebar), was developed at the National Institute of Advanced Industrial Science and Technology in Japan. And while the effect it produces sounds a bit science-fictiony, the mechanics behind it are actually quite simple to grasp. Basically, when we speak normally (which is to say, without weird futuristic sonic weapons in our face), we don't simply project noise by moving our lips and tongue while pushing out air. That's part of it, sure, but we also use our ears to actively listen to our words to guide our speech. This is part of the reason why deaf people often sound different than those who can hear.

To describe it simply, the SpeechJammer is a speaker and a microphone, both designed to accurately target a small cone of direct sound. As it "listens" to its victim, it quickly projects the words back at him or her with a small delay of two hundred milliseconds, creating what nerds call "Delayed Auditory Feedback," and what boring people call "annoying echoes that make me sound funny." It may not seem like much, but it's enough to jumble up even the stoutest of would-be Ciceros.

According to the team who put this 1984 2012 wonder together, their purpose was twofold. The first was for use in what the public comfortably considers "quiet spaces," like libraries and movie theaters. The second was to disarm "louder, stronger" voices from dominating conversations.

"We have to establish and obey rules for proper turn-taking when speaking," the paper explaining the SpeechJammer reads, "However, some people tend to lengthen their turns or deliberately interrupt other people when it is their turn in order to establish their presence rather than achieve more fruitful discussions. Furthermore, some people tend to jeer at speakers to invalidate their speech."

So, essentially, they invented it so people would be forced into polite conversational tactics at gunpoint.

Nice.

This... this I like, actually. I think there's quite a few of us who would benefit from having this kind of tool in a professional environment.

Of course there are some really obvious censorship uses for this thing so I imagine we won't see this being very popular as a personal defence tool. On the other hand I can see this being used to silence abusive individuals, kinda like pepper spray for the voice.

So, what do you think about this device?

Edited March 2, 2012 by Velotix von Skruviktorrius

[Soniman]

This will be perfect for my sister.

[-Robin-]

Can we use this for Congressional hearings? Lord knows we need to have one on hand for the committee members who insist on interrupting people who are trying to answer their questions.

[Phantomime]

This is the kind of thing we pay scientists to work on?

I mean, I'd rather this than something extremely dangerous, but still.

In all seriousness though, this is weird, but I suppose cool. Can't think of THAT many uses, but, I guess...

I dunno. I suppose it could be funny, but I can't think of that many practical uses for it.

Perhaps we could install them in courtrooms?

[SweeCrue]

An anti- Justin Bieber/Rebecca Black weapon you say?

Edited March 2, 2012 by Sweecrue

[buba]

I think that any regular gun shot to the right place can stop anyone form talking... forever.

Edited March 2, 2012 by Tmsp

[Nintendoga]

For some wierd reason, I transcribed the topic title as "Scientist create gun that physically transports you" I was astounded for a few seconds thinking "A Portal gun? Already!?" before re-reading it and becoming a little dissapointed.

Still this is weird and....weird. I can't really see this helping people other then shutting up someone they don't like, which I'm sure has to be illegal somehow?

Edited March 2, 2012 by Nintendoga

[Match]

Don't all guns physically stop you from talking?

[Mono]

I wish I had one to block out my family.

[SuperStingray]

Don't all guns physically stop you from talking?

If it doesn't kill you, it usually turns your current sentence into "OW YOU SHOT ME!" Unless you're Theodore Roosevelt, in which case you just carry on like you weren't even hit.

[Gaming Misfit]

Finally. A way to silence my math teacher without death.

[Stacy]

If it doesn't kill you, it usually turns your current sentence into "OW YOU SHOT ME!" Unless you're Theodore Roosevelt, in which case you just carry on like you weren't even hit.

Seriously thought I bet the government would rather have a gun that makes people talk!

[Emmett L. Brown]

"Hey Mr. Rocket Scientist! When are you guys gonna make a gun that shoots portals, huh?"

"God, I am so sick of hearing about the portals! How about I make a gun that shuts you up?"

[Danj86]

Another fine reason why Japan is freakin' awesome! ^-^ - (not sarcasm)

I have a quiet speaking voice, so I'm not always heard...and I hate repeating myself....

When the topic said "gun that physically stops you from talking". I got this image of a gun that could fire clamps that attach to people mouths... ^^;

On a side note, isn't it strange that Oil Ocean and Tmsp both got popular stars for the same joke? lol

[Axl.EXE]

An anti- Justin Bieber/Rebecca Black weapon you say?

I do approve of sound weapons being used in this manner.

[JezMM]

I already play Left 4 Dead with voice_loopback 1 turned on so my demo files record my voice, meaning my voice already plays back to me as I speak! I'm already trained to be immune to this!

(Though admittedly when you watch... my gameplay videos I do noticably... appear to speak in short bursts during erm... games as I deal with the... handicap of this).

[Solkia]

Order your STFU Ray now, and we'll send you a memory eraser free!